“The reality is sexual abuse and sexual violence sadly affects children, women and men from all backgrounds”
A man who was sexually abused at just seven years old by the older brother of his friend is speaking out to encourage other victims of sexual crime to speak out.
Robert (not his real name) is now 49 years old, and was just seven when he was sexually abused by the older brother of his friend, who was in his 20s at the time. The abuse was consistent and occurred until he was 10 years old.
Robert reported to police when he became an adult and his perpetrator was arrested and charged and progressing through the criminal justice system when he passed away unexpectedly. Although Robert never had his day in court, he does not regret coming forward and is now speaking out as part of this awareness campaign to encourage others to do the same.
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He said: “I was seven years old when I was sexually abused. For years, I carried that silence into adulthood, convinced it was too late to speak and that no one would listen.
“Reporting non-recent abuse comes with real barriers — fear, shame, fragmented memories, and the worry of not being believed. As a proud member of the LGBTQ+ community I also struggled with the added fear of stigma and misunderstanding, but your identity does not reduce and skew your experiences.
“Speaking out was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it was also one of the most powerful. I want others to know that your experience matters, no matter how long ago it happened, and who you are does not make your voice any less valid. Breaking the silence is possible — and support is there when you’re ready.”
It comes as the PSNI are urging people across Northern Ireland to challenge harmful myths about sexual crime and to support victims within minority communities, as part of National Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week (3-8 February).
Sexual crime can affect anyone, regardless of age, gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity or disability. However, victims from minority communities often face additional barriers that prevent them from reporting abuse or accessing support.
In 2025, 4,360 sexual crimes, including online, were reported to the PSNI. 1,690 were from women, 2,238 from children and 326 from men. In this time, 1,081 arrests were made, that have since resulted in 297 charges, a 3% increase in arrests compared with 2024.
Detective Superintendent Kerry Brennan from PSNI’s Public Protection Branch said: “One of the most damaging myths around sexual crime is that it only affects certain people or communities. The reality is that sexual abuse and sexual violence sadly affects children, women and men from all backgrounds, including LGBTQ+ people, people with disabilities and those from ethnic minority communities.
“We know that many victims in these communities experience heightened fear, shame or isolation, and may worry they won’t be believed or understood. Our message is clear: sexual crime is never the victim’s fault, and we want to listen, support and protect you.”
The PSNI are encouraging people to look out for signs that someone may be experiencing sexual abuse or sexual violence. These can include:
- Sudden changes in behaviour, mood or confidence
- Withdrawal from friends, family or activities
- Anxiety, fear, or signs of distress around certain people or places
- Unexplained injuries or changes in personal boundaries
- Increased use of alcohol or substances
- For children, regression in behaviour or sudden changes in school engagement
Friends, family members and carers are often the first to notice these changes and play a vital role in supporting victims to seek help.
Detective Superintendent Brennan added: “For many victims in minority communities, there are real and understandable barriers to reporting. These may include fear of discrimination, cultural stigma, language barriers, concerns about immigration status, lack of accessible services, or previous negative experiences with authority.
“We are committed to addressing these barriers and ensuring our response is respectful, trauma-informed and inclusive. Reporting can happen in different ways, and support is available whether someone chooses to report immediately, later, or not at all.”
The PSNI are urging anyone who has experienced sexual abuse or sexual violence, or anyone who is concerned about another person, to come forward. Reports can be made directly to police, through a trusted third party, or with the support of specialist organisations including The Rowan.
The Rowan, Northern Ireland’s regional Sexual Assault Referral Centre, provides medical care, emotional support and forensic examination in a safe and supportive environment. Importantly, victims can choose to have forensic evidence collected and safely stored at The Rowan without make an immediate report to Police. This allows individuals time and space to decide if and when they wish to pursue a criminal investigation or prosecution. For more information visit: https://therowan.hscni.net/
“Taking that first step can feel overwhelming,” Detective Superintendent Brennan said. “Knowing that support and evidence preservation are available, without pressure to proceed, can make a crucial difference. The choice is always with the victim.”
Reports can be made directly to police, through a trusted third party, or with the support of specialist organisations.
“If something doesn’t feel right, trust that instinct,” Detective Superintendent Brennan added. “By challenging myths, listening without judgement and encouraging reporting, we can help protect people and prevent further harm.”
Anyone affected by sexual abuse or sexual violence can contact police on 101, online or 999 in an emergency.
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