This weekend, I was at a BBQ when the subject of Taylor Swift’s wedding extravaganza and her choice of song to walk down the aisle to came up.
It was an instrumental version of Love Story, one of the first songs she wrote. As all Swifties will know, she has described it as the most romantic song she’s ever written – her version of Romeo and Juliet with an epic proposal and a happy ending.
‘It’s like Taylor manifested her own proposal and wedding,’ observed one of the guests. That made me smile.
These days, I hear someone mention manifesting at least once a week – even the male contestants on Love Island are at it.
I’ve come to realise I’ve been manifesting my entire life with huge success.
I didn’t understand that’s what I’d been doing until the day my first novel, The Four Streets, became a bestseller in 2014.
I remember the moment clearly. I was in a Cotswolds coffee shop with a friend when Piers, my agent, called and told me to check how my newly released book was doing on Amazon.
I opened the page on my phone and watched as the number of five-star ratings clicked up and up. As I refreshed, the orange No1 bestseller tab appeared.
Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s wedding extravaganza was said to see the bride walk down the aisle to an instrumental version of her song Love Story. ‘It’s like Taylor manifested her own proposal and wedding,’ observed one of the guests
This may sound arrogant but, in all honesty, I wasn’t in the least bit surprised, which possibly tempered some of the joy I should have felt in that moment.
That’s not because I thought I was super talented but because I’d not expected anything less.
Every word had been written against a backdrop of me imagining that call from Piers and visualising that orange banner next to the title of my book. In the coffee shop, I was simply reliving a moment that had played on a loop in my mind for over a year.
However, it was the words of the (now former) friend opposite me which made me think more deeply about it all.
‘It’s amazing,’ he said. ‘Because really, you had no right for that to happen, did you? I mean so many people write a book but only a handful of many thousands published every year become bestsellers. How did that happen? Why yours and not any of the others?’
He was right – but how to explain to him that I knew exactly why. It happened because at no point had any other scenario been an option.
Call it manifesting or setting goals, or a surfeit of self-belief and grit, but it had happened to me before.
When I started my business – a childcare consultancy for working parents and firms – from my bedroom in 1988, I set the mental goal that I would sell it in ten years. I spoke about that ambition every day to my husband – not as a possibility, but as the reality.
When I decided I wanted to become an MP, I spoke and behaved as if it was happening. I wrote ‘My Place of Work’ on a photo of the House of Commons and stuck it on the fridge door. I read it out loud to myself every time I opened the fridge door. And I visualised myself standing between the green benches, making a speech.
I know now that it isn’t just me doing this. Many people visualise the future they want and make it happen. The key is to eradicate every shred of self-doubt and to believe – deep down in your very soul – it has already happened.
Take actor Nick Frost, who has been cast as Hagrid in the upcoming HBO TV adaptation of Harry Potter. ‘Before I was cast as Hagrid my partner suggested trying to manifest it,’ he said. ‘So, I watched every Harry Potter movie back-to-back and wrote out by hand the word Hagrid, 7,000 times.’
Actor Nick Frost, who has been cast as Hagrid in the upcoming HBO TV adaptation of Harry Potter, says he used manifesting to help secure the role
Manifestation coaches would say Frost was telling the Universe he is Hagrid. That he was manifesting the version of himself which existed in another space/time dimension and the Universe was making the rest happen.
Others would argue Frost is an accomplished actor who knew he could deliver the role, who’d done his research and nailed the audition. Well, I don’t disagree with that interpretation either.
Many would put my achievements down to being an ambitious working-class girl with a vision who’s worked with steely grit towards her life goals.
It doesn’t always go according to plan, however. Last week, after paying for an expensive holiday, I told my family: ‘It’s ok, I’m going to win a nice prize on the Premium Bonds this week.’
The next day, I saw I’d won £425. My mistake. I should have said: ‘I’m going to win the million!’
But I remain a believer. I feel I’m at a crossroads in my life now, so last night I identified five ‘goals’ for my future. I wrote out each one. I thought hard about them. Then I said each one out loud and I imagined how I would feel in the moment they came to be.
Now my job is to feel and think and behave as if all five have already arrived, to never let any doubt creep in.
To sceptics, I say: This is what I want from life because if you don’t truly know what it is you want – or even who you want to be – how are you ever going to achieve it?
Find a man who hugs like this
Kate, Princess of Wales, gets a hug from Prince William after finishing the Three Peaks Challenge in aid of The Royal Marsden cancer charity
The bear hug Prince William bestowed on Kate after she completed the Three Peaks Challenge tells you all you need to know about the road this couple has travelled.
It was the hug of a man who is in awe of his wife – who knows and values who, and what, he has by his side. It was the wholehearted hug of a man who has confronted the possibility of loss and never wants to let go. And it’s a lesson to single women everywhere.
Find a man who hugs you like William hugs Kate and settle for nothing less.
It’s winning that counts
Last week, my granddaughter told me sports day was imminent. Don’t forget, I told her, it’s not the taking part that counts, it’s the winning.
The lecture that followed from my daughter was off the scale. You’d have thought I’d told the child to chop off her pigtails. But my granddaughter knew what I meant, looked me straight in the eye and smiled.
It is a gran’s job to cut through this woke ‘taking part’ nonsense! Sports day was yesterday and, dear reader, she won! Granny always knows best.
Cheer up, Adele, F1 is thrilling
Adele walks in the paddock during the F1 Grand Prix of Great Britain at Silverstone Circuit
Adele was at Silverstone at the weekend – and looking pretty fed up about it, too. Perhaps the cameras caught her ‘resting b**ch face’. I jest.
But how can anyone attending the British Grand Prix not enjoy it? One of the best days of my life was spent there as Culture Secretary, when I presented the Spanish driver Carlos Sainz with his F1 trophy and got sprayed with Champagne by Lewis Hamilton.
I spent the day on the grid, in the trophy room and milling around with the drivers before watching the race. It was utterly thrilling, and an amazing day I will always remember. If you think F1 isn’t your thing, watch the Netflix TV series, Drive To Survive – but be warned, you will end up hooked.
I have been reliably informed about the potential of a local hosepipe ban, should this gorgeous weather continue. Well, I can tell you this, no hosepipe ban is going to be responsible for the withering of my glorious agapanthus. I shall rebel!
If you didn’t get an invite to Taylor Swift’s wedding, then check your spam folder, because it feels as if everyone (except her former BFF Blake Lively) got one!
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