Natalie Cowie decided to cancel her wedding after trying on her size-24 wedding dress
There is a size-24 wedding dress that hangs in Natalie Cowie’s loft that has never been worn and no-longer fits. Natalie, now a size eight, bought the dress in 2021 when she planned to marry Brian, but obstacles kept getting in the way – the Covid pandemic, her own illness, and then her size.
When her wedding dress arrived, she tried it on and felt deflated. She hated the way she looked and called the wedding off. She realised she could not get married until she felt better about the way she looked.
It had been a stressful time. With her mum Valerie dying unexpectedly from an infection and stroke at the age of 59 and the onset of strange tingling and numbness all over her body, Natalie had not been looking after herself properly. The accountant from Essex says: “It started as constant pins and needles. Then I struggled with heat.
“I’d turn the shower hotter and hotter and couldn’t feel it. I dropped things because I couldn’t grip properly. Walking made me tired very quickly and I had spasms in my arms and legs that were exhausting. It felt like my body wasn’t mine.”
Months of tests and doctors appointments followed while doctors failed to establish what was going on with Natalie. At one point she was given the terrifying news that she likely had multiple sclerosis, but a later doctor disagreed. Scans showed lesions on the brain but tests were inconclusive.
It was a confusing and anxious time for Natalie, now 44, and she was stuck in limbo. “Losing my mum was a shock. And with everything that was going on with my health, I felt stressed and anxious. I ate more and more. And the more weight I gained, the worse the numbness felt. It was a vicious circle.”
Natalie gave up cooking, instead snacking on crisps, chocolate and fizzy drinks all day and eating takeaways at night. By 2021 she weighed 16stone seven at 5ft 3ins and was feeling terrible about herself. And she was constantly exhausted.
“I hated the way I felt. Shopping was awful. I wouldn’t try anything on. I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror I, didn’t recognise myself,” she says.
So over Christmas 2021, she decided to make a change. She had tried community weight loss groups, cutting out whole food groups, soup diets and cabbage diets, but nothing stuck, so when she found weight loss management programme LighterLife online, she was intrigued.
She signed up to TotalFast, a dietary replacement plan which swapped ordinary meals for 600-800 calories a day. She ordered her first box which arrived in time for her to start the diet in January 2022. The first few days were the hardest.
She was angry, hungry, exhausted and struggling with headaches. But after a week she had lost half a stone and she felt so much better. She also saw a mentor, attended community group meetings and received cognitive behavioural therapy which helped her examine her eating behaviours.
“By day five I felt lighter and I soon started to feel incredible. I felt healthier than I’d ever felt,” she says. After seven months, Natalie had lost 7stone and she saw a complete health transformation.
As her health restored, the symptoms of her mystery illness improved. She was able to move more easily and started running, a habit which she continues to this day. She also eats much more healthily now; enjoying treats and takeaways every so often but mostly sticking to home cooked food.
“After seven months I’d lost 7stone 2lbs. It was amazing. People couldn’t believe it,” says Natalie. “Some were worried about whether it was healthy to lose so much weight, but once they saw how much better I looked they were supportive.”
While she still experiences spasms and numbness now, the symptoms haven’t changed and she no longer seeks investigations at the hospital. And she eats more mindfully now.
“The therapy element of LighterLife helped me understand my unhealthy eating habits,” she says. “Eating had become mindless. I’d wander to the cupboard because I was bored. You don’t get to that size because you’re hungry. Now I make better choices.
“I’m so happy that I now have control back in my life. I make choices that help me feel fitter and healthier. I feel the best I’ve felt in a long time. And I know I won’t go backwards now. I won’t let myself.”
By July 2023 Natalie had ordered a new wedding dress – this time a size eight – and she and Brian married in their village church surrounded by 150 friends and family members.
“It was an incredible day. One of my husband’s friends, who we hadn’t seen in a while, was invited to the reception. Seeing the bride on the dancefloor, he walked straight out again as he thought he was in the wrong place. He didn’t recognise me after losing all my weight.”
She keeps the old dress as a constant reminder of how far she has come. “It’s hanging in the loft as a reminder of where I never want to return,” she adds.
