5 Near-Perfect ‘Far Side’ Comics That Took Sci-Fi to Completely Absurd Places

Throughout the ’80s and the first half of the ’90s, Gary Larson‘s The Far Side ruled the comics section of the newspaper. While others strips, such as Peanuts and Calvin and Hobbes, used several panels to tell quick stories with the same characters, The Far Side took satirical jabs at everything with just one panel to tell it all.

Although the characters changed in each comic, Larson often returned to familiar themes, whether it be dinosaurs, talking animals, or bizarre kids and their families. Then there’s what he did with sci-fi, from goofy scientists to aliens from outer space. These five comic strips showed how much Larson could do with so little.

5

‘Professor Schwartzman’s Canine Decoder’ (1991)

Dogs are man’s best friend. For centuries, they’ve been by our sides as loyal companions who are always excited to see us, even if we’ve only been gone for five minutes. They sit at our feet, welcome our attention, and sleep in our beds. Humans and canines have a close connection. Two species so far apart need each other, and if you’ve ever had a dog, you’ve often wondered what they were thinking. Could they say “I love you” and tell us how much they care? Maybe they have the same fears we do.

In The Far Side, Gary Larson answered the question with Professor Schwartzman, who came up with a brilliant invention which could decode what dogs are saying when they bark and translate it to English. The results are disappointing. Whether they’re barking at each other, at us, or chasing cars, all dogs have to say is “Hey!” Perhaps it’s better that they can’t speak after all.

4

‘The Dog Spaceship Arrives’ (1984)

Gary Larson often turned to dogs as a source of material in The Far Side. In this comic, they don’t need to be decoded by a professor. Instead, they can speak full English to their owners. At night, one dog is tied up outside of its dog house when a spaceship arrives filled with other canines. If you’ve often wondered if dogs were some sort of loyal gift from the heavens, sorry, but they’re from outer space.

Sick of how they’re being treated by humans, it looks like a lot of them have decided to go back to their home planet. Before this dog goes, all he wants his owner to do is roll over. Let her see how it feels to be commanded to do things for the entertainment of others. As the flying saucers float overhead, will something violent occur if she doesn’t listen?

3

‘Earth Is a Balloon’ (1980)

In 2026, despite so many photos of Earth having been out there for decades, there are still “flat Earthers,” the conspiracy theorists who reject science and, for some reason, insist Earth is not round but flat. Even in 1980, the wild theory existed, along with those who think the government faked the moon landing. In this Far Side comic, Gary Larson takes a jab at both.

As astronauts on a ship return to Earth, they see something shocking. The Earth isn’t round. It’s not flat either. Nope, we’re all hanging on a balloon floating in the nothingness, a long string tailing into space. An astronaut deciding to keep it quiet is just what the government would do in real life, eh! Here, Larson uses over-the-top absurdity to make his point. But what if it’s true, and we really are on a giant balloon? Be careful where you step out there!

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Many junior high and high schoolers have taken some sort of technology class, whether it be something like wood shop or, in the case of this Far Side strip, metal shop. In those classes, we built contraptions which often don’t come together right. This writer struggled mightily with making a miniature house out of popsicle sticks and glue. Meanwhile, some teacher who was thought not to be smart enough to teach other classes watched over us and judged our every move.

In this panel, one kid has had enough. The boy hasn’t struggled at all in metal shop. He’s built a giant, sophisticated robot with tank-like feet, mandible claws, and sharp rows of teeth. Presumably, the kid has been harassed by his uncaring teacher one too many times. Revenge has created a mad scientist origin story and Mr. Big Nose will be the first victim.

1

‘Xenomorph Birthday Cake’ (1983)

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In 1979, Ridley Scott created a sci-fi horror masterpiece with Alien. Gone were hokey sci-fi movies with bad acting and silly-looking men in suits. With Alien, an all-time badass heroine was born in Sigourney Weaver‘s Ellen Ripley. And the monster she fought, a lone Xenomorph designed by H.R. Giger, was absolutely terrifying. Alien has one of the most iconic jump scares in film history, when the baby Xenomorph is born by shooting out of the chest of poor Kane (John Hurt). The scene was so effective that Hurt parodied it in a cameo for Spaceballs years later.

In 1983, four years after the release of Alien, Gary Larson gave the comic world this hilarious tribute to the classic. In it, we see a Xenomorph birthday party. With a cake in the center of the table, it’s not a beautiful woman who pops out but a baby alien. As it bursts forth, the older aliens throw up their scraggly arms and open their jaws wide with excitement. It’s a great tip of the hat to a legendary movie and its monster.