Entertainment
The Harsh Realities of Peak Millennial Activism
Imagine this: After months of finally coming to the conclusion that you want a divorce, you lay it out for your spouse, and then the next morning, Russia invades Ukraine. Okay, sure, perhaps if you don’t live in Eastern Europe, the invasion might not really affect you as much as the reality that you now need to retain a divorce attorney. But for Vytas (Marius Repšys) and Marija (Žygimantė Elena Jakštaitė), in Lithuania, the war presents a new complication during this unpredictable time for them and their daughter, Dovilė (Amelija Adomaitytė). Director and screenwriter Andrius Blaževičius puts a microscope on the complex family dynamic that inevitably appears after a divorce and sets it during the timely invasion of Ukraine to put the realities of war and social justice into sharp focus.
What Is ‘How To Divorce During the War’ About?
In 2022, Marija and Vytas wake up in separate beds to the news that Russia is launching a full-scale invasion of Ukraine. This is just a day after Marija told Vytas that she wants a divorce, not telling him that she’s been quietly having an affair with her co-worker, Jūratė (Indrė Patkauskaitė), for months. While Vytas feels completely blindsided by this, his more immediate problem is now that he must find a place to live. Marija is the sole breadwinner of the family, working for a video production company that makes social media video slop. Vytas, a once-successful filmmaker currently out of work, both looks down on Marija’s day job and actively benefits from her salary. In exchange, he is the primary homemaker, taking care of their daughter Dovilė, making dinner, and cleaning the house meticulously.
The separation completely throws both Marija and Vytas’ lives into disarray. The couple is pro-Ukraine and makes every effort to show it. Vytas is forced to move home to his Russian-sympathetic parents, but every other day, he’s throwing rocks into the windows of Russian cars. He begins volunteering at a food bank and participates in artistic protests in the city, using his modicum of fame to amplify their message. Meanwhile, Marija brings in a Ukrainian family of refugees to live with her and Dovilė shortly after the war begins. She actively opposes her company’s continued partnership with Russia at the risk of her own career, and ties up the Ukrainian flag on her balcony with her daughter in a firm show of support.
However, as the war wages on, Vytas’ actions feel more and more performative, and Marija becomes annoyed with the extended stay of the refugees in her home, with whom she can barely communicate. In the background, Dovilė experiences troubles at school as children echo the varying sentiments of their parents. How To Divorce During the War carefully and deliberately illustrates the very real and complicated feelings that come with the Russian invasion, and rather than wag a finger at anyone, the film forces you to look at the nuances of the war, warts and all.
‘How To Divorce During the War’ Depicts Performative Activism’s Upsides and Downsides
Living in the Lithuanian capital of Vilnius, both Marija and Vytas are no stranger to working with their European neighbors, and many Lithuanians have some kind of tie to the two warring countries. Although Marija and Vytas outwardly express their support for Ukraine, this support wanes in ferocity as time stretches on. It’s not that they are just posting black squares on social media or tweeting into a void — they aren’t slacktivists — but their performative actions and the desire to be on the right side of history feel, in many ways, self-serving.
The upper-middle-class privilege comes on full display after the split. Marija is happy for a Ukrainian mother and her two sons to come and live with her, in a very bold show of how eager she is to help. But she jams all three of them into Vytas’ former office, and it’s not long before she’s complaining about how dirty they are and struggling to communicate with them. When she defiantly quits her job due to the fact that her company won’t break ties with Russia, she doesn’t consider that she still has to provide for her daughter and also the new family living with her. It’s a perfect example of that privilege that Marija is so confident in quitting based on her morals, when the reality is that most people work for morally-dubious companies and remain there for the simple reason that they need a paycheck.
Mstyslav Cherno takes us into the darkest depths of the war in Ukraine.
With Vytas, his return home means that he’s plagued with his parents essentially watching the Russian version of Fox News, a channel spouting propaganda that he desperately tries to push his parents not to believe. Whenever he sees a Russian license plate, he doesn’t even hesitate to throw a rock through the car window as a violent form of protest. Of course, the Russian government is to blame for the invasion, but should these citizens pay the price of something they have little to no control over? Vytas thinks so. Rather than seeking employment, he volunteers (occasionally helping himself to the food that is meant to go to refugees thanks to his dwindling funds) and participates in artistic protests to a crowd of dozens where he lies on the ground covered in fake blood.
Protesting, volunteering, and housing refugees all benefit the Ukrainian effort, which, for Marija and Vytas, might excuse the fact that their motives behind their actions are largely an effort to self-soothe. Being fully aware that Russia is in the wrong means that they are also conscious that they might not be doing enough. Add to the fact that Russia is less than a five-hour drive away, and the growing fear of what Putin might do next, and both characters are pushed to their extremes.
Andrius Blaževičius Gets the Details Right in ‘How To Divorce During the War’
Blaževičius carefully toes the line between the politics and the domestic drama of How To Divorce. While it might be easy for us to shame Marija for how she treats her new house guests and chastize Vytas for his vandalism, it’s also hard to paint them as pure villains. Galvanized by good intentions, Blaževičius makes a very pointed commentary on the burden of living in this world where we are constantly exposed to the horrors of war and disaster. Feeling helpless and hopeless, it’s not hard to see why the protagonists of the story want to do everything they can, even if it’s not sustainable for them.
Both Repšys and Jakštaitė deserve praise for their performances. After the separation, Repšys plays the awkwardness of Vytas perfectly. From awkwardly asking a Ukrainian sex worker about her family after doing the deed to being covered in red corn syrup while waxing on about the purpose of their protest, Repšys can make us both sympathize with Vytas while also cringing at him. Jakštaitė has the difficult task of making us empathize with Marija. As the cheating spouse and the homeowner stressing out her refugees, it’s not easy to like her. But Jakštaitė is able to show Marija’s frustration and depression without saying a word, humanizing her in just a few quiet moments that remind us that Marija is not the one we should shift all our blame onto.
Blaževičius follows the timeline of events, carefully documenting with an inobtrusive eye as feelings change, politics shift, and a desire for equilibrium trumps the passion for social justice. Lithuanian cinematographer Narvydas Naujalis is able to speak volumes in his shots of the quiet daily life of a country that is on edge. Simple things like the setting of the film depict the evolution of the characters; what starts as a clean and bright apartment where Marija and Vytas live with their daughter slowly dims and becomes cluttered as the film progresses. Layered with symbolism and unafraid to show the spectrum of reactions to a tumultuous time, How To Divorce During the War is a thoughtful drama that highlights the global impact of a war on the smallest scale.
How to Divorce During the War debuted at the 2026 Sundance Film Festival.
- Release Date
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January 26, 2026
- Runtime
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108 minutes
- Director
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Andrius Blaževičius
- Writers
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Andrius Blaževičius
- Producers
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Marija Razgutė
Cast
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Žygimantė Elena Jakštaitė
Marija
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- Strong performances from the leads, especially during the characters’ most unlikeable moments.
- Bla?evi?ius presents a complex issue without losing the intimate look at the divorcing couple.
- The film loses focus with the family dynamic and Dovil?’s character is kind of neglected.