Trump spent several hours snoozing through a meeting of the poundshop SPECTRE he’s set up to rival the UN, before giving a genuinely odd response to Andrew’s arrest. Here’s a roundup of the last 24 hours in Trumpworld
Donald Trump is on his way to Georgia, where he’ll give a speech about the cost of living.
That’s the theory at least. As we mentioned yesterday, there’s another push to get the erratic, elderly president to stay on message – and talk about something voters are actually worried about.
That push started on Friday, after a strategy meeting of Trump’s top team. The cost of living and the reduction in drug prices. That’s what he’s supposed to be talking about from now until November’s midterms.
So obviously Trump has spent the last couple of days talking about Iran, Gaza, the Chagos Islands, occasionally Epstein, and hosting the inaugural meeting of his Board of Peace – the tin pot gaggle of autocrats and wronguns he’s set up to rival the UN.
Good luck getting him to stay on message at a rally speech, is all I’m saying.
Meanwhile in Trumpworld
- He gave a very weird response to Andrew getting arrested
- Another Pyongyang-style banner of his face has gone up on a government department
- Highlights of the BoP meeting
- Trump has a black friend
Here’s what you need to know
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1. Trump’s response to Andrew getting arrested was VERY weird
Donald Trump was asked for his thoughts about Andrew Mountbatten Windsor getting his collar felt this morning. And his response was truly bizarre.
He started by going on about how sad it was for the royal family. I mean, sure. But then he said this: “I’m the expert in a way because I’ve been totally exonerated. That’s very nice. I can actually speak about it very nicely.”
First of all, nobody’s been exonerated about anything. While inclusion in the files doesn’t suggest guilt or knowledge of Epstein’s crimes, Trump’s name does appear in there thousands of times. And there have been whistleblower allegations against the President that were at least credible enough, according to the documents, that the FBI sent someone to interview the whistleblower.
Anyway, he went on: “I think it’s a very sad thing. It’s really interesting because nobody used to speak about Epstein when he was alive, but now they speak.
“But I’m the one that can talk about because I was completely exonerated. I did nothing.”
It’s just a really weird thing to bring up when asked about someone else, is all.
2. Another Pyongyang-esque banner of Trump’s face has gone up in Washington DC
You may remember some consternation last year when a giant banner of Trump’s face was raised on the Department of Agriculture in DC. And then another was raised later on the Department of Labour.
Well, a third has been put up – this time on a slightly more troubling place: The Department of Justice.
Of all the government departments, the DoJ is probably the one for which independence from the White House is the most important.
But given how casual Trump has been in ordering the DoJ to go after his enemies, they may as well just slap his picture on the side of the building at this point.
3. The Board Of Peace held their first meeting and it was exceptionally long
The Board of Peace, the poundshop SPECTRE Trump set up to rival the UN, held its first meeting in Washington DC. It was, as you might expect, a lengthy and tedious exercise in the leaders and representatives of countries – including some of the world’s most oppressed and authoritarian nations – lining up to tell Trump how great he was.
The waxing started in earnest with amateur diplomat Steve Witkoff telling Trump it was “my greatest honour to work for you. It is the blessing in my life. I’ve had many blessings. But this is my greatest blessing.”
Witkoff is the living embodiment of the Peter Principle, but at least he’s grateful.
The meeting was way too long and batsh*t to cover every moment in detail. But here’s a few highlights.
- Trump said the BoP would be “looking over” the United Nations – “making sure it runs properly”. Presumably his interest will largely be directed at the escalators and teleprompters, which he moaned about AGAIN during his opening speech.
- Trump said he was disappointed to get a note telling him Norway had offer to host a meeting for the Board of Peace, because he thought the note from Norway was going to say they were giving him the Nobel Prize.
- Norway later confirmed they’d made no such offer, and that they have no intention of joining Trump’s Board of Peace because the council’s structure is “problematic”
- They played a series of propaganda videos about how great Donald Trump is, and all the wars he’s stopped.
- Tony Blair gave a speech. Trump looked real sleepy throughout.
- The Prime Minister of Egypt kept referring to Trump as “your excellency” for some reason
- The President of Kazakstan proposed “to establish a special President Trump award” to recognise his “outstanding peace-building achievements.” How this would be different from the made-up award Fifa gave him a few months ago is unclear.
4. Speaking of Fifa …heeeere’s Gianni
FIFA boss Gianni Infantino was at the board meeting. And wore a red USA hat.
“”Everyone here is the head of a country, except for Gianni — but he’s the head of soccer, so that’s not so bad,” Trump said.
“Right, Gianni? I think I like your job the best.”
It is entirely unclear why he was there.
5. It was so long in fact that Trump appeared to drop off a bunch of times
Of course, it being a 2 hour plus meeting, with presumably quite comfy chairs, and quite boring speeches, often not in English, Trump used the opportunity to catch up on a little shut-eye.
6. Jared Kushner insisted nobody is “personally profiting” from the reconstruction of Gaza
After playing a deeply unsettling video suggesting Gaza will be a full-blown resort within a decade, Jared insisted nobody’s in this to get rich.
“A lot of these people are volunteers,” he insisted, implausibly. “They’re doing this not for any personal gain, people are not personally profiting from this. They’re really doing this for their children, for their grandchildren and because they really want to see peace.”
I wonder if Trump’s pallid son-in-law is familiar with the old English phrase “Chinny reckon, mate.”
7. And it ended in the most Donald Trump way possible
Of course the inaugural meeting of the Board of Peace was drawn to a close by Donald Trump banging a tiny gold gavel, after which YMCA was played.
Because of course it did.
8. Trump says isn’t racist, and if you don’t believe him, ask Mike Tyson
Trump hosted a reception to mark Black History Month at the White House last night – and spent quite a lot of his speech insisting that he couldn’t possibly be racist, because despite posting videos of the Obamas depicted as apes on social media, he has a black friend. Who happens to be a convicted rapist, but we’ll let that slide.
He also mentioned that he likes Nicki Minaj, who, let’s face it, he only likes because she likes him.



