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Heartbroken woman tells boyfriend ‘leave me’ after being diagnosed with aggressive cancer

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An Irish woman called Lydia Whelan has opened up about her breast cancer journey and how her biggest fear after being diagnosed was her house sale collapsing

A woman revealed the heartbreaking conversations she had with her loved ones after being diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of just 32 — including telling her boyfriend to leave her.

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Lydia Whelan and her long-term partner Colm had just been given the green light on a house sale agreement when their lives took an unexpected turn two years ago.

Just one week before the sale was agreed, Lydia, who is from County Kildare, Ireland, was visiting her doctor after spotting a change in her breast.

And on July 30, 2024, Colm was by Lydia’s side at St James’s Hospital in Dublin when a doctor confirmed she had cancer. It was later confirmed to be aggressive and stage two.

In an emotional interview with Dublin Dialogues, Lydia remembered: “I just erupted and my partner erupted and I was like, ‘I knew it.’

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“Then very quickly I was like, ‘How am I going to tell my mother?’ It was all like a lot of emotions and feelings kind of came at once and I found myself sitting there… myself and my partner after going ‘sale agreed’ on our home in the middle of all this.

“So that was very daunting.”

Due to her diagnosis, Lydia, a support worker for adults with intellectual disabilities, could not get approval for mortgage protection, and there was a fear that she could lose the house.

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And being remarkably honest, she said: “I have said it before to a lot of people, I was more upset about the potential of losing my house than I was of being told I had cancer because I was looking at the future, myself and my partner for 10 years together at that point, this was the next stage for us.”

She added: “I was like, ‘I don’t know how I’m going to cope.’ If we lose our house, I was telling him to leave me. I was like, ‘I’m holding you back.’

“It’s conversations that you don’t expect to have at the age of 32.”

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And in another heartbreaking conversation, this time with her parents, she revealed: “I remember going home to my mum and dad and I was still living at home at this point and I just burst out crying. I was like, ‘I don’t want to lose my hair.’”

Thankfully, Lydia’s partner, family and friends offered nothing but love and support, and she said she would not have gotten through her treatment without them.

Lydia is now a cancer survivor after several brutal rounds of chemotherapy and she said the last two years still feels surreal to her.

“There was a lot of questions,” she said. “A lot of hurt, a lot of anger, a lot of why me? Like, how? I was healthy. I was on a fitness journey.”

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She added: “It’s been the roughest rollercoaster I could have ever imagined. It’s not something you know how to deal with or are told how to deal with.”

Lydia started her chemotherapy at the end of August 2024 and she gave a devastating insight into how difficult it was.

“It absolutely wipes you, takes away what you see in the mirror,” she said. “I really struggled with that aspect. Still to this day I do. But my friends and my family, the support network I have is amazing.”

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Lydia, who also had radiation and surgery, was extremely ill during and towards the end of her chemotherapy and at one point she felt unable to complete another two rounds to take the total to six.

However, while some days she would cry for hours, there were others when she remained positive and looked towards the future. She is now living a beautiful life having completed her treatment.

Her house sale went through after Colm had to draw down the mortgage by himself and this December will mark two years since she and Colm moved in together. Lydia must now wait another four years before she can be named on the mortgage when she will officially be in remission.

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She now shares her story to raise awareness about breast cancer and in a message to others, she said: “I continue to drive home about checking yourself every month.

“People have come up to me and said, ‘I’m afraid to check myself because of what I’d find.’

“And it’s wild how that’s someone’s thoughts on it. And I’m like, ‘Yeah, but if I didn’t find it when I found it, I would not be here today. There’s no might. I wouldn’t.’

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“My cancer was spreading very very fast. I would not be sitting here today.”

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She said she now lives her best life, just as she did before her cancer diagnosis, and says “yes to everything”.

Lydia, now 34, added: “It’s given me a new lease of life. As hard as the journey has been, I now don’t stress about the small things. I take a beat. I would have been a very quite anxious and nervous person.”

She added: “I’m still here, I’m still alive, I’m still breathing. I’m just grateful for every day that now if I do have a bad day, I’m angry at myself for having a bad day.

“But as humans, we’re always hard on ourselves. But no, continue to looking forward to even the small things in life.

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“A cup of coffee, fresh air, the sun. Little things that we so easily take for granted.”

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