How To Stop Your Daughter Falling Out Of Love With Sport

The data around how many girls end up falling out of love with, and ultimately, stop engaging with, sport is damning.

More than 1.3 million teenage girls in the UK who once considered themselves “sporty” disengage from sport after primary school, according to Women in Sport.

Research from the Youth Sport Trust also found enjoyment of PE dropped from 86% among girls aged seven to eight to just 56% by ages 14 to 15.

Another survey – this time by ASICS – found 64% of UK girls drop out of sport before they turn 16. It’s a bleak trend that will impact girls’ physical and mental wellbeing both in the short and long-run.

The Youth Sport Trust highlighted lack of confidence, having their period and being watched by others as key barriers for girls, while Women In Sport’s research listed a fear of feeling judged by others, lack of confidence, pressures of schoolwork, and not feeling safe outside as major hurdles.

ASICS found another key barrier appears to be what girls wear, with 70% of 14- to 16-year-old girls surveyed saying they would be more likely to participate in school PE lessons if their kit was more comfortable.

A national Girls’ Day School Trust (GDST) survey of 1,358 girls aged nine to 18 across England and Wales found that confidence drops significantly between the ages of 14 and 18.

GDST is now calling for a rethink on how girls’ sport is viewed, arguing that staying involved in sport helps develop confidence, resilience and leadership skills.

Coutts Coutts-Wood, Director of Sport for Wimbledon High School GDST, said removing the barriers that make participation more difficult for girls is key to encouraging them to stay in sport.

Changes in friendship groups, confidence and self-image during adolescence can make sport feel intimidating, even for talented players.

Hannah Morrell, Director of Sport for Blackheath High School, urged parents to stop asking kids, ‘did you win?’ and start asking, ‘did you enjoy it?’, ‘did you feel part of the team?’ or ‘what were you most proud of?’.

“Belonging, enjoyment and confidence are stronger predictors of long-term participation than results alone,” she added.

She encouraged parents to celebrate attendance, teamwork, courage and commitment “just as visibly as medals and match results”.

“Staying in the game is often a bigger success than winning it,” she added.

Similarly, Dr Patapia Tzotzoli, clinical psychologist and founder of My Triage Network, previously suggested that instead of focusing on outcomes (ie. winning or scores), parents should comment on the effort and approach young people make to help boost confidence.

Adolescence is one of the biggest turning points for girls’ confidence, with concerns around body image, peer judgement and social comparison becoming more pronounced.

Instead of treating dropping out of sport as an inevitable part of growing up, Coutts-Wood suggested “treating confidence dips like growth spurts: they’re expected, but they need support”.

“Encourage girls to stay connected to sport, even if they reduce their competitive commitments for a period,” she said.

That after school netball or hockey club isn’t just an extracurricular activity they’re doing to fill time. Experts stress sport is one of the most powerful leadership activities girls will experience.

Every training session develops resilience, communication, teamwork, decision-making, confidence and the ability to recover from setbacks – qualities consistently identified as essential for future leadership.

“Talk about sport differently. Help girls recognise that what they’re learning on the hockey pitch, athletics track or netball court is preparing them for university, careers and leadership, not just the next fixture,” Coutts-Wood added.

Some parents might think their children should quit sport in order to focus on exams and revision – but this is actually one of the things that could help them cope with stress during this period.

The experts noted that sport provides routine, stress relief and social connection during some of the most demanding years of school, yet it is often the first commitment girls sacrifice.

Morrell continued: “When exam pressure builds, it can be tempting to put sport on hold. But staying active, even in a reduced or more flexible way, can be one of the best ways to manage stress, build resilience and protect wellbeing during one of the most demanding periods of school.”

It’s not just parents who have a role to play in all this. As for the ways schools can encourage more girls to stick with sport, Coutts-Wood suggested tweaks like offering a wider choice of activities, recognising that participation looks different for every girl, and ensuring the PE kit is designed with girls’ comfort and confidence in mind.

She ended: “Small changes like these can make a real difference in helping girls stay active throughout their school years and developing a lifelong love of sport.”