‘I bought over 100 cheap sex toys from America – it was ridiculous’

Ever ordered a box of 100 cheap sex toys from America to hand out to paying audience members at your live shows? Perhaps that’s only a story Desiree Burch can tell.

The comedian and actress, 47, is famously candid when it comes to such matters – you probably only need to know she’s the voice of hit Netflix series Too Hot To Handle to realise that.

So, when asked what her ‘most ridiculous purchase’ has ever been, it’s unsurprising that she had a colourful answer.

Appearing on the Spent podcast, the British-American star dived right in, responding to Matt Edmondson with: ‘The one that leapt to mind was a box of cheap sex toys.’

Checking if she is allowed to ‘say dildo’ (she’d already said it), she continued: ‘They were technically dildos. They were not vibrators. That would have been a price that I could not afford.’

Admitting that she’s ‘definitely expensed’ the NSFW items, she, thankfully, was able to provide context, having ordered the silicone toys for a show she was doing.

‘This was the time that I was coming over to do the Camden Fringe Festival. I’d already done Edinburgh one year, and then I wanted to perform in London.

‘I was bringing the show that I was touring at the time before I moved here, called 52 Man Pickup.’

The comedy show involved plenty of audience participation (it wasn’t a gig for anyone remotely prudish), as Desiree opened up with a deck of cards and went through discussing sexual encounters from her past, sharing what she learned from each.

Desiree said that the show was always random, and it was ‘interactive with the audience’, as she’d encourage fans to also speak frankly about their bedroom antics.

‘It was great, because people were like, “How do you get people to participate?” And it’s like, all you have to do is show vulnerability. And then people were like, “I want to do that”.’

She described it as an ‘immensely fun’ routine, particularly while performing it in the US and UK, where there seemed to be an element of ‘sexual repression that wants to be released’.

As for the relevance of the sex toys, one of her games involved asking male audience members to be the ‘physical embodiment’ of descriptions of her past partners, while women had to guess ‘who the high card should be’.

‘I had two different women do it, and whoever won got the dildo.’

She needed them for every show to make the segment work, though, obviously, which meant taking the wholesale route to stock up ahead of the run.

‘I had to order a box and get them shipped from the States over here,’ she recalled, explaining how it became 17 or 24 dildos during her Fringe stints, but before that, she was going into three figures.

‘I think I got in a box of 100 or whatever. Because obviously, you buy in bulk, so I went direct. I bought them wholesale. Which, if you don’t have a business…’

‘Also, like, these were not dildos that I would ever sell. Do you know what I mean? They weren’t great,’ she laughed. ‘They were just there and pink and penis-shaped, because that’s all they needed to be, and kind of jiggly in order for the gag to work… because I feel like you either get one good sex toy or 100 subpar ones? And, I chose the second, of course.’

Podcast host Matt was somewhat lost for words following her tale, stating that it was, indeed, quite the unusual purchase.

‘The fact that they came from America, through customs… that poor X-ray person,’ he remarked.

‘You say that,’ Desiree retorted, ‘but this is a kinky country.

‘This cannot be their first or last… I imagine they’re seen daily.’

Desiree Burch’s episode of the Spent podcast is now available.

Got a story?

If you’ve got a celebrity story, video or pictures get in touch with the Metro.co.uk entertainment team by emailing us celebtips@metro.co.uk, calling 020 3615 2145 or by visiting our Submit Stuff page – we’d love to hear from you.

MORE: America’s Next Top Model star J Alexander, 67, reveals stroke left him ‘unable to walk’

MORE: Callum Turner’s James Bond comments confirmed my worst fears

MORE: Al Pacino and Robert De Niro lead tributes for ‘phenomenal’ Robert Duvall