Influencer Lorna Luxe has detailed how her eating disorder became a ‘full-time job’ and admitted she would do secret workouts that she hid from husband John.
Talking to Davina McCall on her podcast Begin Again, Lorna, 43, recalled how she became incredibly unwell battling anorexia after getting a job as an air hostess.
And she admitted she developed a ‘war mindset’ when it came to managing her disorder, working out twice a day, with one workout being done in complete secret.
She told Davina about where she thinks her eating disorders originated, saying: ‘I had been at uni and like anyone, you’re drinking loads and you’re eating loads and I put a bit of timber on.
‘I was a bit of a curvier woman. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but I wasn’t happy in how I looked.
Lorna Luxe has detailed how managing her eating disorder became a ‘full-time job’ and discusses the secret workouts she kept from husband John
And she admits she developed a ‘war mindset’ when it came to managing her disorder, working out twice a day, with one workout being done in complete secret
‘Then when I started to diet and lose a bit of weight, I also saw that people treat you differently, right? So I had interest from men I’d never had that before.
‘And when I got my Virgin job, when I went for my Virgin Atlantic interview back in 2002, they weighed you, they checked your height, they took a photo of your face, they wanted to see what you’d look like in the uniform. This was the norm back then.’
She continued: ‘And actually them as a brand, they’re so different that now, all their advertising is all about celebrating inclusivity, but at the time it was just a standard protocol. I imagine with all airlines that people had to fit a mould.’
Lorna said she believes she was rewarded in some way for losing weight.
She said: ‘I got in there because I’d lost a bit of weight. So, it was always in the back of my head from the day one of that job. Okay. you’ve been rewarded.
‘And so maintaining weight because if you changed uniform size, you got pulled into the office because it cost the business money.
‘So all these things were playing in my mind. I was living in Brighton, partying a lot, drinking, boozing, eating kebabs and having to manage my weight became an absolute full-time job.
‘And so sadly for me, I used my job, you know, flying away transatlantic. You stay down route somewhere for a couple of days, no one’s going to see what you’re up to.
Lorna said: ‘When I got my Virgin job, you know, I when I went for Virgin Atlantics interview, and this is back in 2002, they weighed you, they checked your height, they took a photo of your face, they wanted to see what you’d look like in the uniform. This was the norm back then’
John, who was 21 years Lorna’s senior, died in February after battling stage four adrenal cancer after being diagnosed in April 2023. The couple had been married 16 years
‘So your behaviours, your habits can really start to manifest. And I became incredibly unwell and it’s terrifying when I look back.’
Lorna admitted that as well as controlling her eating, she was working out like a ‘manic obsessive.’
She said: ‘I also think that you know the the real peak of my illness. I was with John now so he didn’t know about this either.
‘He’d got me a David Lloyd membership in Brighton, there’s one in Worthing and there’s one in the marina and I would go to the one in the marina in the morning.
‘I’d cycle all the way down the seafront which was a schlep if you know Brighton. I’d go down there and then in the evening I’d go to the Worthing one.
‘I’d be there for two, three hours and when I look back now I’m impressed at you know the energy I put into that.
‘How was I even keeping going? You get into this very war mindset where I was doing daft things and my behaviours were changing, my mood swings were up and down I was permanently cold.’
Lorna sadly lost her husband John in February. He died following a battle with adrenal cancer on February 11, 2026, at the age of 64
She said that at the height of her eating disorder battle, he did what he could to try and help her.
Lorna said: ‘He would often say like you just you lost a bit too much weight now. “You’re beautiful but you’ve just gone a bit too far”. And also on flights, I might fly with someone.
‘A girl that I’m still mates with now, Cla. She’d suffered with anorexia, so she recognized the signs straight away and she pulled me in the galley.
‘She went, “You’ve got a problem. This is not good. You need to look after yourself. I’m here if you need me.” And I treated her with such disrespect at the time.
‘I was rude to her. I was like, “Don’t be so ridiculous. This is actually really out of order. What are you saying? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with me.”
‘I think that’s such a brilliant defense mechanism because it does put people off talking to you about it. It frightens people from broaching it.
‘I’ve worked really hard to be skinny so you’re not going to [ __ ] with this now. And that was my headspace.
I was like, “don’t you dare try and come for me on this because this is the the only thing I’m really good at”.
‘I kept thinking, I’ve got the secret sauce here. They don’t know. But I’m on to something with this. And I was really proud of my ability to undereat and be hungry.
‘And that’s really terrifying. Thank God that I’ve come through the other end now. I definitely have control issues but just with different things now like my business is what I control and I John certainly gave me those tools to feel like I’m your safe place.
You don’t need to be in control anymore because I’ve got you. And he kind of stepped into that role for me in a big way.’
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