11 Warning Signs That Could Flag A Teenager Is Suicidal

No parent wants to even consider that their child might be thinking about suicide.

But sadly, some teens do have these thoughts – and, in rare and devastating cases, they act on them. According to Samaritans, around 200 young people die by suicide every year.

It can be hard for parents to know if their child is experiencing such dark thoughts, however. A study of young people aged 11 to 17 and their parents found that amongst teens who reported they had experienced suicidal thoughts, 50% of their parents said they had no idea of what their child was going through.

Fiona Yassin, a psychotherapist and founder and clinical director of The Wave Clinic, told HuffPost UK: “It’s not always easy to recognise when a young person is thinking about suicide. Sometimes, young people themselves will not be clear that they’re having suicidal thoughts.”

To mark World Suicide Prevention Day (10 September), Yassin has shared some of the early warning signs that might signal a young person is experiencing these thoughts, including:

• Saying goodbye to pets and/or friends;

• Giving away or dividing up possessions;

• Misusing drugs or alcohol;

• Isolating themselves from the rest of the family in the home;

• An increased interest in death or discussing funerals – this may appear as ‘How to…’ questions in internet search history;

• A sudden in-depth knowledge about suicide or dying;

• Expressing ideas about death through art or writing;

• Relationship problems with peers, partners, or family members. Yassin noted these often precede suicide attempts. “This is especially true for young people below the age of 14, who are less likely to have a diagnosed mental health disorder. In these cases, suicide attempts may follow a short period of distress centred around social relationships,” she said.

• Expressing feelings of hopelessness, sadness, guilt, shame, or worthlessness;

• Losing interest in activities they’d usually enjoy;

• Expressing ideas like ‘things would be better without me’.

Unfortunately, the internet makes it easier for children to see posts and find out more information about suicide, which they can then act upon.

Analysis by Ripple Suicide Prevention Charity estimates that nearly 1,000 UK searches online for suicide and self-harm information take place every day.

The charity’s CEO, Alice Hendy, said her brother Josh took his own life in 2020 following extensive searches for methods and advice on how he could die by suicide, which he found with ease on the internet.

“It is more important than ever for us all to be vigilant of the signs of someone in crisis, particularly during a period when harmful content is so easy to come by,” Hendy said.

Yassin is also concerned about this. “Social and online media has made it easier for children and young people to see posts about suicide. Not only can they be very traumatic for children to see, but they can also provoke young people,” she said.

“For example, a teen who is already struggling with their mental health may see this, realise there is an exit point and want to copy it.”

Young people who self-harm may be at an increased risk of suicide attempts. For this reason, Yassin also advises keeping an eye out for signs of self-injury. Aside from visible injuries, she urges parents to be vigilant of:

• Unexplained burns, bite marks, cuts, bruises, or other marks on their body;

• Insistence on covering parts of their body with long clothes or other material;

• Feeling low, depressed, and withdrawing from relationships;

• Angry outbursts;

• Self-blame.

If you believe your child is experiencing suicidal thoughts, or they’ve told you they have, Yassin said this should always be taken seriously and treated urgently.

• Stay in the moment with them, sitting with their sadness and despair without trying to fix it immediately.
• Reassure them that you are listening, that you take their feelings seriously, and that you are there with them. “It’s important young people feel their feelings are being recognised and taken seriously,” said the expert. “When their distress is met too quickly with reassurance or attempts to make it better, they may feel unheard or misunderstood.”
• Avoid dismissing their comments or actions as “attention-seeking” or minimising what they’re expressing.
• Mirror their language. “Reflecting their language back to them helps them feel understood and shows that you are not afraid to meet them where they are,” added Yassin.
• Stay calm. “However uncomfortable, scared and distressed you may be feeling, it’s really important you stay calm and centred,” said the expert. “People often tap into anger when they are scared. Check that you do not sound angry. If you do sound angry or if you think your young person thinks you’re angry, be honest. Let your child or teenager know that even though you may sound angry the emotion you’re actually feeling is sadness.”
• Reassure your child they won’t feel like this forever and “this is a moment in time that will pass”.
• Stay with them. “Even if you feel the conversation has ended in a peaceful place, do not leave a young person alone when it has finished,” she added.
• Take extra precaution and remove any objects that could be used as a way to follow on with the discussion about suicide if they were left alone.
• Seek professional help. “If your young person is suicidal, shares suicidal ideations, or you believe they are at risk, seek professional help from a GP or mental health professional immediately. If it is a medical emergency, call 999,” she added.

The family therapist ended: “You do not have to manage this alone, and it’s important your young person receives support from those who are specially trained in this space. Plus, ensure you are talking to the people who can extend their support network, such as the school counsellor.”

• Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
• Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
• CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
• The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
• Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org