Politics
US navy deal with literal mountains of shit
The US navy’s biggest aircraft carrier, the $13bn USS Gerald R Ford, is in literal deep shit – because it’s toilets are crap.
After participating in Trump’s war crime abduction of Venezuela’s president Maduro, the ship was ordered to sail to threaten Iran on behalf of Israel’s ambitions of regional dominance. This means it has been at sea continually for eight months instead of its usual maximum of six. Despite the vessel’s huge price tag, its toilet system simply isn’t up to it. The system needs a frequent $4m acid flush to remain functional and hasn’t been getting it, so its 650 bogs are close to complete collapse, leading to 45-minute queues outside the few that still work.
THE PLANNED U.S. ATTACK ON IRAN has a hitch: most of the missile-targeting crew are queuing for toilets on the lead vessel, the USS Gerald R Ford.
This is not a joke. A set of emails was obtained by NPR, a US public broadcasting group, revealing that toilet wars have broken out… pic.twitter.com/2rbq7d5CK2
— Nury Vittachi (@NuryVittachi) February 23, 2026
The literal stink is reportedly causing rows and tension among the Ford’s roughly 4,500 crew. Their plight makes that of grimacing cabinet members and White House staffers, who recently had to rush reporters out of the Oval Office after Trump allegedly soiled himself, look cushy by comparison.
Oh dear. How sad. Never mind, eh.
Featured image via the Canary