What’s Making Teenagers Anxious? Therapists Share Their Thoughts

What Kids Are Carrying is a HuffPost UK series focusing on how the nation’s youngest generation is *really* feeling right now – and how parents and caregivers can support them.

Anxiety is one of the most common issues young children and teenagers are bringing to therapy, according to therapists.

Just like there are myriad reasons why young children are increasingly anxious – from over-exposure to screens, to neurodivergence, to absorbing anxiety of ‘grown-up problems’ like money worries – for teens, there are a number of factors driving their anxiety. But therapists are witnessing some key trends.

“Adolescence is a challenging time, and the move towards increased independence while still only having recently left an era of play and imagination can bring with it increased anxiety,” said therapist and BACP member Amanda MacDonald.

“Teens will be aware of exams coming up, and other factors surrounding their immediate world, together with an awareness of global concerns such as conflicts and the environment.

“All this is going on at a time when they are working out who they are, and forming friendships based on this developing sense of identity.”

A 2025 survey by BBC Radio 5 Live and BBC Bitesize, which polled 2,000 kids aged 13-18, found two-thirds (69%) of all participants reported feeling anxious at least some of the time. Pressure around exams and grades was the biggest worry.

Counselling Directory member Debbie Keenan suggests teen anxiety is often driven by a mix of developmental pressure, expectations and uncertainty.

“Recurring themes include academic performance, social comparison, questioning identity/sexuality and fear of failure,” she noted.

Therapists also noticed the Covid-19 pandemic seems to have “significantly amplified” anxiety as teens experienced disrupted routines, isolation, and a prolonged sense of threat. Keenan noted this may have “sensitised their nervous systems and reduced their capacity to cope with stress”.

When your child is struggling, you probably want to jump in and solve all their problems for them, but experts suggest the best way parents can support is to simply be there, be curious and listen without judgement.

Connection is key. “Check in with them to see how they are doing, and get a sense of what is happening in their life,” advised MacDonald. Sometimes it can help to do these check-ins while you’re doing something else together – gaming, shopping or driving in the car, for instance.

Joseph Conway, psychotherapist and mental health trainer at Vita Health Group, previously suggested that “side-by-side talking” can help teens, especially boys, feel comfortable enough to open up.

“Pick an activity they enjoy, such as football, baking, crafting, or gaming, to create a safe-space for conversation,” he said.

“Shared activities give boys room to open up without feeling scrutinised, or having the intensity of eye contact.”

Another helpful tip from Keenan is to explore your teen’s “window of tolerance”.

“The window of tolerance is the range in which a person can think, feel, and learn effectively,” she explained.

“When anxiety pushes them outside this window, they may become hyperaroused (panic, avoidance, irritability) or hypoaroused (shutdown, numbness).”

Support starts with helping teens recognise these states and teaching regulation skills. This might look like slow breathing, grounding, mindfulness or co-regulation exercises “to bring them back into their window of tolerance”, Keenan said.

Counselling Directory member Bella Hird stressed that it’s key for parents to resist all urges to tell their teen “there is nothing to worry about”.

“Never in the history of mankind has anyone ever calmed down when told to ‘calm down’,” she said.

Counselling Directory member Mandi Simons agrees that teens benefit more from being listened to without judgement or minimisation.

Discussing what to do instead of saying “there’s nothing to worry about”, Hird suggested the internal narrative of “I am not worried about this but I want to understand your worry” can be helpful for parents to take on board.

“The experience of not being heard or understood is only going to add to the experience of anxiety,” she explained. “If you can show them you are willing to truly understand their anxiety and sit with them in it, you will be modelling that anxiety is not something to be feared and just simply our minds and bodies picking up on data that something is amiss.”

She added that sometimes, studying the “data” may throw to light an understanding that can be really helpful, for example a belief that might be challenged or a “worse case scenario” that isn’t that bad after all.

“Once you have allowed space to explore the anxiety you can together find ways to support,” she added.

Of course, if your teenager is no longer getting involved with the things they enjoy, or seems to have low or irritable moods that go on for longer, making contact with a mental health professional can help.

When anxiety fuels school avoidance

Therapists are noticing there are a growing number of children struggling to attend school because of anxiety, particularly since the Covid-19 pandemic.

A survey by youth mental health charity stem4 found more than one-quarter (28%) of 12- to 18-year-olds hadn’t attended school in 2023-24 because of it, according to the Guardian.

If your teen is struggling with anxiety and it’s preventing them from going to school, Hird suggested that open communication with the school is important, “but make sure that the goal remains the wellbeing of the child and that you don’t fall into the trap of becoming anxious that you won’t find a suitable solution”.

“You will,” she added. “This is where counselling or coaching can be particularly useful for a parent.”

Charity Young Minds recommends for parents to tell their teenager’s school about the specific things they are finding difficult and also asking their teacher(s) about anything they’ve noticed. Getting a note from your child’s GP, CAMHS or another mental health professional can also be helpful to show why your child isn’t at school.

“If you and your child have already identified some things that might help, ask for specific changes,” adds the charity. “If you’re not sure where to start, ask what changes the school can offer…” You can also ask for these changes to be formalised in an Individual Education Plan. It might also be helpful to schedule check-ins with the school so you can assess how your child is getting on.

Keenan noted that some of the effective strategies she uses, in collaboration with parents/caregivers, include: reassurance, gradual and gentle exposure back to school, validating anxiety without reinforcing avoidance, addressing underlying learning or social issues, and strengthening coping skills so teens feel safer tolerating distress rather than escaping it.

Macdonald acknowledges that while it can feel very concerning for parents who may feel worried for their child’s future, “for some young people this may pass, and they may just need a bit of time to have some adjustments made”.

For other young people, when attending school feels impossible, compassion is key.

“Your teen is in distress, and it may be at that time they need more space than a day or two at home will provide,” she concluded.

“There are young people who have taken paths other than traditional ‘bricks and mortar’ education, and who thrive in a different setting.”

• Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
• Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
• CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
• The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
• Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.