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Ketamine Therapy And My Sexual Awakening

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Ketamine Therapy And My Sexual Awakening

“Is there anyone we can call?” the EMT asks, standing over me as I raise a shaky hand to my left collarbone and feel the bulge that shouldn’t be there. I am sitting on the pavement, my Madewell jeans now covered by a long black streak down the left leg, still wearing my motorcycle helmet. My elbow is shattered into three pieces, and the pain radiates down my arm to my pinky and ring finger, where my wedding band always used to be.

“No, there’s no one. I have no one!”

I panic about who will take my elderly, rescued basset hound for her bedtime walk if I go to the emergency room. I look over at my Vespa — an impractical divorce gift to myself — laying on her side with huge dents and scuffs ruining her beautiful mint green body. My phone and rainbow pride keychain are trapped in the storage compartment under the tan leather seat.

Just a few months before, after undergoing ketamine treatments as a last-ditch effort to ameliorate my relentless existential depression, I told my husband that I couldn’t be married to him anymore because I was meant to be with a woman. Now I am desperately alone in the back of an ambulance experiencing a cataclysmic life event. And yet a feeling of “It’s supposed to be this way” reassures me that just like ending my marriage and coming out as a lesbian, this accident is part of my life path.

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A year earlier, when I started the IV ketamine treatments that ultimately led to my sexual awakening, no one warned me that I might experience an ego death. “If this is what death feels like, I’m totally OK with it,” I thought as I sank deeper into the blissful emptiness. I remembered all the times I wanted to end my own life over the years. Suddenly, without the fear of the unknown keeping me from acting, the thought of returning to my “waking life” terrified me. Death seemed like a better option than perpetual self-hatred.

I broke down in tears as the nurse removed the IV from my arm.

“I don’t want to live like this anymore!” I wailed.

My sweet husband came in to hold my hand as I steadied my breathing.

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“I don’t know what’s wrong with her,” the nurse told him quietly, as if I wasn’t in the room. “I’ve never seen anyone react this way.”

I thought back to our wedding all those years ago, and how I mistook the deep pit in my stomach for typical wedding day jitters. On the outside, I was smiling, but an unfamiliar voice within was screaming at me to run.

I hated myself for not being able to give my husband the love and intimacy he deserved. The infrequent times we did have sex, I was drunk and closed my eyes tightly and left my body until it was over. I felt broken and ashamed.

Throughout the years, we continued to grow and move forward in our lives, progressing in our careers and relocating to different cities and buying bigger houses, but the feeling that something was off persisted. As the depression worsened, my problematic binge drinking escalated.

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I avoided the basement of our starter home because I imagined myself hanging from our cast-iron pipes. When we moved to Texas, I regularly drove home in my tiny convertible in a blackout drunk state, completely disregarding how much it hurt my dear husband, because I honestly didn’t care if I made it back to him or not.

One night, after downing two bottles of red wine, Googling local gay bars and failing another “Am I gay?” quiz online, I shut myself inside our closet, curled into the fetal position, and cried till I passed out.

I emerged from my office one evening and quietly admitted to him, “I think I’m bi. What does that mean?”

I knew the word I wanted to say was “gay,” but I wasn’t ready to utter it yet. I was still hoping we could somehow stay together, that maybe I wasn’t ruining our lives. And how could I possibly know that I’m gay without ever kissing a woman? He took a deep breath and eventually said, “I always knew this was coming.”

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I looked down at my hands — half of my fingers were bandaged from picking at my cuticles until they bled. I remembered that wild animals chew off their own feet if caught in a trap as an attempt to save themselves from capture.

“I kept quiet as long as I could. It feels like I don’t have a choice anymore.”

I signed a lease for a small apartment in the city where the stores hang rainbow flags in their windows. With a houseplant in one arm and my basset hound’s leash in the other, I walked into the sun-filled space and felt the words “this is where you heal” rise inside me. I placed the plant on the counter and crumpled to the floor in a heap of tears and wrapped my arms around my dog.

“We’re gonna be OK,” I reassured both of us.

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My upbringing hardwired my brain to believe that same-sex attraction was dirty, shameful, and something to be kept secret — locked away and buried so that I could fit into what people wanted for me. It’s like cutting out part of your soul so that you can be loved.

I flourished in my newfound freedom over the next few months. People said they’ve never seen me so happy. I took time to date myself, going to concerts alone, getting dressed up and making dinner reservations for one. I never imagined a fun night out would end with a life-changing accident.

The physical recovery was excruciating. I spent eight weeks lying in my living room waiting for my surgical incisions and bones to heal, and another three months doing physical therapy to regain full range of motion in my elbow and shoulder.

My collection of thrifted travel books stared back at me from their shelf and reminded me of the life I always wanted. Amid overwhelming despair and pain, I realised that I am so lucky to be alive. I thought back to my ego death and remembered being surrounded by divine love and protection, and feeling like something was guiding me toward the life I was meant for. I thought about all the experiences I still hoped to have, and started dreaming of ways to make them happen.

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“I think you’ll be really happy with the settlement amount,” my personal injury lawyer said, as I muted the phone so I could burst into tears of joy without judgment. “Just sign the paperwork, come get your check, and you’ll be all set.”

My ex-husband moved home, and met someone to build a new life with. I know he now has the loving marriage he deserves — the one that I could never give him, despite how much I wanted to. Me speaking up — and him letting me go — allowed us both to find happiness.

The travel guides are finally being used, and I’ve discovered the joy of solo trips abroad. I found healing in Mexico, and gratitude in Italy. I recently went to Paris alone, but never felt lonely.

I continue to go on dates, and apart from a casual romance, am yet to find a first girlfriend. I remind myself that I needed this time alone to build community, to make precious friends, to heal physically and emotionally, and to undo a lifetime of hiding.

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I am still looking for the love I knew I had to make myself available for when I realised I could no longer be married. I am confident I will feel it in my now-healed bones when I find her. I trust that she is out there, on her way to me, and that we will both know it when the time is right.

That night in the ambulance I had the thought, None of this would be happening if I were still married. Had I not been confronted with an ultimatum from the Universe during that ego death, directing me to speak up or never be happy, I would still be pretending. I would have the comfort and security of a marriage to my best friend, but I would not love myself. Even in that moment of desperation and pain, I knew I had made the right choice by speaking my truth. I felt reassured that this was the divine path that was meant for me all along.

When we are confronted with life-altering choices — “Do I say something? Do I ruin our lives?” — we can make our decision from a place of fear or love. Staying quiet and staying with my ex-husband would have been the path guided by fear. In the face of absolute uncertainty, I chose love by honouring my inner voice.

I know now that I am meant to be here, despite years of wishing that I wasn’t. Though I haven’t yet found my person, I feel more joy than I ever thought possible, and I am so freaking grateful for that.

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Erika Hearthstone is a pseudonym of an author who lives in Texas and writes about identity and healing. Her work centres on queerness, spirituality, and courageous self-acceptance, and is working on a collection of personal essays.

Do you have a compelling personal story you’d like to see published on HuffPost? Find out what we’re looking for here and send us a pitch at pitch@huffpost.com.

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Police use drug dealer’s own rap lyrics to expose trafficking network

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Wales Online

The lyrics of Clough’s rap said: ‘A run this town with white and brown / A got a mad little crack round’

Drug dealing leader caught bragging with rap and photos of cash

A court has heard how police were able to use a smug drug dealer’s own rap lyrics to help bring down a criminal enterprise which had been supplying heroin and crack cocaine across North Yorkshire.

Bradley Clough, from Redcar, dared officers to “prove it” when confronted about his crimes, before a track he had recorded was discovered om his phone, along with photographs of cash and incriminating messages. Clough bragged about how he “run the town with white and brown”, reference to the Class A drugs he and his associates were distributing, in the song.

The 25-year-old, identified as the gang’s ringleader, appeared in court alongside five associates, on Friday (April 11), where he was jailed for 15 years. His right-hand man Callum Quinn, 26, received an 11‑year sentence while the remaining defendants were handed custodial sentences for their lesser roles in the enterprise.

Clough, 25, of Thrush Road, Redcar, was “top of the tree” in the conspiracy, which officers foiled in September 2024. The gang racked up an estimated £80,000 during their enterprise, which utilised two drug lines to advertise deals of heroin, cocaine, crack cocaine and zopiclone tablets.

A cocky Clough told officers to “prove it” when quizzed about his crimes, something which officers were able to do by using photos and his the suspect’s own rap song about drugs taken from his phone, a court heard.

The lyrics of Clough’s rap said:

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A run this town with white and brown / A got a mad little crack round / No weed a smoke more than your selling / Come round here a teach yas all a lesson / What a got and what a made a count it all. As a blessing / Coz wen a was in my cell man a was stressing about my line / Ppl taking the p**s coz a got bit of time / My new grafter trying to snake me on my line.

Drug dealing leader caught bragging with rap and photos of cash

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“Clough was the main ringleader of the group and set the drugs line up when he was released from prison last year. He ran the operation but didn’t go near the drugs,” explained Detective Sergeant, Collingwood from the Dedicated Drugs Unit at Cleveland Police.

“He let the others do his dirty work. Crucial evidence taken from Clough’s phone included photos of him holding large amounts of cash, incriminating messages relating to the supply of drugs and even a rap song he had made about his drug dealing antics.

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“Hopefully Clough’s time in prison will inspire further raps about what it’s like to spend time behind bars. We are pleased with the success of this investigation; taking drugs off the streets and five people in prison paying for their crimes.”

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‘We took a big chance picking Port Talbot for our music festival, now 100,000 people come to it’

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Wales Online

The headliners at In It Together this year are Madness, Aitch and Snow Patrol.

We’re just weeks away from yet another colourful and musical weekend of In It Together at Old Park Farm in Margam. In the fifth year of the festival Madness, Aitch and Snow Patrol will headline.

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Daisy Lucas from Aberdare is Escape’s head of campaign strategy and delivery. She’s been part of Escape, the company behind In It Together, since the festival was just an idea on a piece of paper.

This year 100,000 people are expected to head to Old Park Farm across the weekend.

The 36-year-old has shared her highlights. She said: “It’s insane when you think about it because it launched in 2021, with the first show in 2022. We’re going into our fifth year and now we’re the second biggest independent festival next to Glastonbury in the UK, which is mental.” From superstar gigs to cosy pubs, find out What’s On in Wales by signing up to our newsletter here

Escape, the team behind In It Together was launched in Newport and they made it their mission to bring good music across Wales. The team spend the majority of the year in Port Talbot, getting to know the local community whilst planning the upcoming festival. Daisy explained that they took a risk when picking the area, and specifically Margam to host the festival.

She said: “We took a chance on picking somewhere like Port Talbot where not many people previously would have stopped.

“It was like a drive-through town, certainly for me when I was growing up and you always had to go to Cardiff for stuff like this. So to put it somewhere like Port Talbot which is so easily accessible for everyone and give them a reason to stop, the community was just like ‘okay’ and just like wrapped their arms around us which was really nice.

“I think if you weren’t from Port Talbot, it was definitely the town of the steelworks but having spent the vast majority of the last five years there, it’s always been so much more than the steelworks.

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“To be able to bring people to Port Talbot so they can discover it for themselves is great.

“Some of the world’s biggest actors are from Port Talbot. You’ve got brands like San Portablo, you’ve got the Richard Burton 10k, you have got people in the community doing phenomenal things. It is just so much more than the the steelworks and it’s really nice that the world gets to see that it’s so much more than that now.”

At the moment, the team are hard at work finalising everything ready for the big weekend which is just seven weeks away. Daisy shared what attendees can expect from this year’s festival, saying: “Well, it’s our fifth birthday, so we’re going bigger and better. Headliners are going to be amazing. I’m fully expecting a very emotional moment when Snow Patrol are on stage on Sunday night, for me, at least.

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“Then there’s going to be like an Oktoberfest beer tent there, there’s the adults arena in the general campsite which is 18 plus and it’s got its own little line-up, the Jazz Café is back and there’s more going on. We’ve got the bandstand this year and we’ve teamed up with Stagecoach who are going to be doing some theatre schools there.”

In It Together will once again be showcasing an array of Welsh artists. Daisy said: “We always sort of have in our ethos to put 50 local Welsh artists, whether they’re DJs, they’re bands, they are solo or they’re Welsh language.

“We’re always committed to that and we always follow through on that, and we never want to lose where we came from, no matter how old or how big we get. So I think it’s important that we remain committed to that every year, which we are.

“From an artist’s perspective, you know, when they come and, you know, some of them might never have heard of Port Talbot before, but when they come, they’re like, this is amazing. This is because there’s a real community spirit around there. It’s really family-friendly, it’s a family-focused festival, and everybody just loves it.”

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Daisy also explained that much like us, she has no idea who this year’s mystery special guest is. In fact, she found out the same time as everyone else that Ruth Jones would be appearing last year.

She said: “I wish I knew. What’s really nice about the mystery special guest is Mark, who’s our director of festivals, he’ll book it and he won’t tell any of us. So we all find out at the same time, which is really fun.

“Last year, I had an inkling when I saw the graffiti, that it could have been Rob Brydon or Ruth Jones. I was like, ‘I don’t know which one it’s going to be’, but yeah, I found out when everybody else did.”

Daisy says people keep coming back year after year, especially families, and they enjoy seeing the grandparents who take up the free ticket offer.”I see the same people come back here and I see families get bigger, kids get older, it’s a really surreal experience,” she said

You can find more information about In It Together Festival and how to get tickets here.

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Drug boss who taunted cops to ‘prove it’ caught out by his own rap lyrics

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Daily Record

Six members of the drug gang appeared in court after bragging about their drug empire in a rap song

Drug dealing leader caught bragging with rap and photos of cash

A brazen drug dealer who flooded Redcar with heroin and crack cocaine even recorded a rap bragging about his criminal empire, before daring detectives to “prove it”.

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The track, discovered on Bradley Clough’s phone, boasted about how he “ run the town with white and brown ”, as his gang pumped kilos of class A and C drugs across North Yorkshire. But the dealer’s luck ran out when police thwarted the complex operation.

Six members of the enterprise appeared before court on Friday (April 11) as Clough, 25, was jailed for 15 years, while his right‑hand man, Callum Quinn, 26, was handed an 11‑year stretch. The remaining defendants were also locked up for their lesser roles.

Clough, 25, of Thrush Road, Redcar, was “top of the tree” in the conspiracy, which officers foiled in September 2024. The gang racked up an estimated £80,000 during their enterprise, which utilised two drug lines to advertise deals of heroin, cocaine, crack cocaine and zopiclone tablets.

A cocky Clough told officers to “prove it” when quizzed about his crimes, something which officers were able to do by using photos and his the suspect’s own rap song about drugs taken from his phone, a court heard.

The lyrics of Clough’s rap said:

A run this town with white and brown / A got a mad little crack round / No weed a smoke more than your selling / Come round here a teach yas all a lesson / What a got and what a made a count it all. As a blessing / Coz wen a was in my cell man a was stressing about my line / Ppl taking the p**s coz a got bit of time / My new grafter trying to snake me on my line.

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“Clough was the main ringleader of the group and set the drugs line up when he was released from prison last year. He ran the operation but didn’t go near the drugs,” explained Detective Sergeant, Collingwood from the Dedicated Drugs Unit at Cleveland Police.

“He let the others do his dirty work. Crucial evidence taken from Clough’s phone included photos of him holding large amounts of cash, incriminating messages relating to the supply of drugs and even a rap song he had made about his drug dealing antics.

“Hopefully Clough’s time in prison will inspire further raps about what it’s like to spend time behind bars. We are pleased with the success of this investigation; taking drugs off the streets and five people in prison paying for their crimes.”

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The stunning town labelled ‘best place to live in Scotland’ with famous bakery

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Daily Record

Ruth Aisling recently visited a Bake Off semi-finalist’s shop in a stunning town hailed for its “stunning Highland scenery and chic Scandi-style sophistication”

A travel vlogger who visited a Bake Off semi-finalist’s shop in a stunning Scottish town has described the bake she tried as “unbelievable”. In her latest adventure, Ruth Aisling, a Scot who seeks to renew her connection with her roots after more than a decade overseas, recently set off to the town of Dunkeld in Perth and Kinross.

In 2023, The Sunday Times named Dunkeld the Best Place to Live in Scotland, citing the area’s “winning combination of stunning Highland scenery and chic Scandi-style sophistication”.

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Ruth explained that she’d wanted to visit the town for “years and years” and began her journey at Dunkeld Bridge over the River Tay, where she claims anglers can enjoy “one of the best places in Scotland” for salmon fishing.

Later, she wandered the town’s “beautiful” streets, referencing some colourful local history involving a battle and the town’s rebuilding in the 18th century, as well as its “top-notch” food scene.

Ruth ultimately found herself at a local establishment with an interesting claim to fame: ARAN Bakery on Atholl Street is a micro-bakery owned by Great British Bake Off semi-finalist Flora Shedden, who appeared on the show in 2015.

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She said: “So ARAN Bakery is one of the famous bakeries here in Dunkeld, and I picked up a few things for my lunch. I got this drink as well, a nettle and elderflower drink. What an interesting combination. Let’s give this a try. Wow, that is so good.”

Ruth was referring to her can of Nuisance Sparkling Botanicals Nettle and Elderflower, as well as a spanakopita spiral pastry. Taking a bite of the latter, she remarked: “So I got this feta pastry that looks so yummy. Wow, that is unbelievable.

“There’s a TV show called the Great British Bake Off. I’ve never actually watched it, but I think the owner of that bakery was in the finals or the semi-finals of that show.

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“I think it’s mostly baking that they do on that show. It’s quite a famous bakery. I think it’s got quite a big Instagram page, a lot of followers. Sometimes when you eat a pastry, it’s quite soggy, or it can be quite dry and crunchy.

“This is the perfect balance of soggy and dry in the middle. It’s perfect. So good.”

Afterwards, she tucked into a nutty caramel shortbread, saying: “This looks so yummy. Caramel shortbread is one of my favourite Scottish treats. This one is an interesting take on it. Instead of chocolate on the top, there are lots of nuts. Everything from that bakery is ten out of ten.”

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According to Hidden Scotland, ARAN Bakery “sold out in four hours” on the day it opened and quickly established itself within the local community, being “cherished for its simplicity and home bakes”.

Some of the mouth-watering items on offer include rosemary, sea salt and garlic focaccia, goat’s cheese and fennel jam toastie, leek and potato soup, and desserts such as mini rhubarb and custard cake and pear, chocolate and espresso cake.

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I Am Maximus wins for second time

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I Am Maximus wins for second time

Good morning and welcome to our live coverage of Grand National day at Aintree, with 34 runners going to post for the world’s most famous steeplechase.

With less punishing obstacles and a field full of contenders with Grade One form, the race’s complexion has changed over the last few decades but interest levels remain as high as ever.

There is nowhere else to start than with JP McManus’ green-and-gold battalion; the Irish owner accounts for four of the top six horses in the betting market.

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I Am Maximus evidently has the class and course form having finished first and second in each of the last two Nationals, with Willie Mullins’ top jockey Paul Townend on board. However, he carries top weight which could prove difficult to overcome in a field with such depth.

Punters have followed Jagwar over cliffs, he is a horse with so much ability but a horrible habit of finishing second, notably to fellow McManus horse Johnnywho in the Ultima Handicap Chase at Cheltenham. Iroko finished in midfield in that race, but has long been considered a National plot after running on to finish fourth last year.

Speaking of plots, the Skelton team commands respect in these blue-chip handicaps and their chance is Panic Attack, tipped by our very own Marcus Armytage to become the first mare to win the race in 75 years. Dinoblue had too much speed for her in the Mares’ Chase at Cheltenham, but Panic Attack is back in handicap company today after successes in the Paddy Power Gold Cup and Coral Gold Cup earlier in the season.

Bobbyjo winner Grangeclare West is another serious player for Mullins with son Paddy in the saddle, while Monty’s Star for Henry De Bromhead has a Gold Cup fourth on his CV and can be relied on to run his race

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Before the main event, there are three Grade Ones on the card: Salvator Mundi is a short price for the Hallgarten & Novum Wines Maghull Novices’ Chase, there is the middle distance Turners Mersey Novices’ Hurdle followed by the Jet2 Liverpool Hurdle for the older stayers.

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Emmerdale’s Bradley Riches marries artist just days after nan’s death

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Daily Mirror

Emmerdale actor Bradley Riches shared a sweet look at his wedding as the star tied the knot with artist fiancé Scott Johnson in an intimate ceremony days after Bradley’s nan died

Emmerdale star Bradley Riches has tied the knot just days after the devastating news that his nan had died. The actor, 24, married artist fiancé Scott Johnson in an intimate ceremony in Maidenhead on Wednesday.

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Bradley, who is best known for playing the part of Lewis Barton in the long-running ITV soap, shared the exciting news in an Instagram post. The happy couple exchanged vows surrounded by famous friends, including former CBB housemates David Potts and ZeZe Millz.

The sweet snap shared on social media showed Bradley and Scott kissing and hitting the dance floor. Bradley opted for a brown three-piece suit for the occasion, while his new husband, Scott, wore a beige outfit. They both proudly donned matching carnations in their buttonholes.

READ MORE: Jordan Brook says ‘unborn baby saved my life’ after meningitis battleREAD MORE: Peter Andre reveals major health fears after terrifying medical diagnosis

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Their special day came just over a week after Bradley broke the heartbreaking news that his nan had died on the eve of his wedding. Just days before he said I do, Bradley revealed his sad family news on Instagram.

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In an emotional post, the star uploaded a throwback snap of the pair from his childhood. And he wrote: “Never did I think I would be saying goodbye to my Gt. Nanny just days before my wedding. Before she passed, she told me she’d be with me on my big day… and I know she will be.” He went on: “She loved Scott so much- never questioned us, just loved us fully. I will miss you every day. See ya later, love you xxx”

Bradley also shared the news post on his Stories. Alongside the post, he added an additional message which read: “Love you so much.” He followed it up with an image of a sunset.

However, he now has good news to share following the exchange of his marital vows. The actor had previously shared a video of his proposal at the end of last year.

He said at the time: “2020 was my favourite yet, but… 2026 is gonna be even better as I get to marry my best friend”. The romantic proposal from Scott took place in Sorrento in Italy.

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He had previously revealed that the day was set to be a star-studded event. “‘I think all of the Big Brother lot are actually coming. Like David [Potts], Colson [Smith], Nikita [Kuzmin], Sharon [Osbourne], Levi [Roots], Zeze [Millz], Marisha [Wallace], Ekin-Su [Cülcüloğlu], and other people I’ve met along the way, like Arlene Phillips, Tasha [Ghouri] from Love Island,” he said.

Best known for his role as Lewis on Emmerdale, both he and his character are autistic. He had previously said after landing the role that it was an important step to represent the neurodivergent community.

Shortly after his debut episode aired in 2024, he said: “I’m so deeply grateful to the scriptwriters for crafting such a moving and authentic scene- showing Lewis overwhelmed by work in a way that felt so real to me and many others.

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“And then to have Nicola step in with such quiet understanding… it was the kind of support every neurodivergent person deserves to feel seen, safe, and understood.”

Like this story? For more of the latest showbiz news and gossip, follow Mirror Celebs on TikTok, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube and Threads.

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Black Phillip’s gothic market at Impossible bar in York

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Black Phillip's gothic market at Impossible bar in York

“A lot of people have been asking if I’m real,” said the character called Black Phillip, docking a white face mask, black bowler hat and dark suit as he stood in St Helen’s Square on Saturday afternoon (April 11). “I am very real. And some people are asking for pictures and the like.”

Phillip said he did not mind the attention from as it helped get people through the door of his market above the Impossible bar.

Inside were 23 traders selling gothic themed produce – from witchcraft items and taxidermy to décor and drawings.

Inside Black Phillip’s Impossible market on Saturday (April 11) (Image: Dylan Connell)

The market is “unlike any other”, Phillip said, “the smell’s strange, the look’s strange and it even sounds a little bit strange”.

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“It’s all about celebrating local alternative culture and art,” he added, “finding those people who make hand-made wares that you can’t find anywhere else, with a certain dark, gothic grandeur, and giving them a platform to sell their wares.”

The market has been in York for around three years, previously held at the Artful Dodger in Micklegate and the York Medical Society in Stonegate.

Saturday was, however, the first time it had been staged at Impossible.

“It’s been very good,” Phillip said of the new venue. “The staff have been excellent – very thorough. I’ve very much enjoyed working with them all. I do hope it’s been a success on their part.”

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Phillip said he is attracted to York as it is “where my vessel lives, and there’s not really anywhere doing this on a regular basis – true alternative art”.

Phil and Louise Potts, from Darkmoon Designs, at Black Phillip’s Impossible Market on Saturday (April 11) (Image: Dylan Connell)

Inside Black Phillip’s Impossible market on Saturday (April 11) (Image: Dylan Connell)

Phil and Louise Potts, from Middlesbrough-based Darkmoon Designs, were manning a stall at the market selling skulls, ghosts and other gothic décor.

It was their first time at the market in York. “We love it,” Phil said. “Everyone is great and it’s a lovely venue with a really good atmosphere.”

He said they regularly visit York and Whitby, which hosts the bi-annual Goth Weekend events, adding: “York and Whitby are our happy places.”

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Darkmoon Designs, Phil said, started as a hobby making 3D printed models before turning into a full business.

Phil said the company has now “found its niche” and started “concentrating on gothic décor – a bit of darkness”.

And it will “definitely” be back in York, he said.

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Yulia Kachurova, from Aurorah Nero, at Black Phillip’s Impossible Market on Saturday (April 11) (Image: Dylan Connell)

‘Sassy frog’ by Yulia Kachurova, from Aurorah Nero, at the market on Saturday (April 11) (Image: Dylan Connell)

Meanwhile, Yulia Kachurova, from Aurorah Nero, was at the market selling gothic drawings.

Yulia, who draws on her iPad then has the work printed, said her drawings feature folklore, ghosts – and frogs, which she is particularly fond of.

Her work also uses humour, an example being “sassy frog” – a drawing of a frog sitting on a mushroom with freshly done hair and long painted fingernails.

“I like meeting people, our local alternative crowd – it’s nice chatting with everyone … It’s such a special event for York,” said Yulia, from Estonia originally and now living in York.

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Liverpool v Fulham LIVE: Premier League latest score and goal updates

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Liverpool v Fulham LIVE: Premier League latest score and goal updates

Liverpool 0-0 Fulham

2 mins: Fulham spring forward through Robinson after soaking up some Liverpool pressure. Konate cuts out the through ball.

The Kop, after chanting Robertson’s name, then belts out Mohamed Salah’s song.

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:33

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Liverpool 0-0 Fulham

1 mins: The game begins with a loud chorus of Andy Robertson’s name from the Kop. This will be one of his last appearances at Anfield.

Richard Jolly, at Anfield 11 April 2026 17:31

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KICK-OFF! Liverpool 0-0 Fulham

Underway at Anfield! A huge game for Liverpool and Arne Slot after two dismal defeats to Man City and PSG. There’s tension in the air as fans protest ticket prices, but Mohamed Salah and Andy Robertson play at Anfield for the first time since announcing their departures at the end of the season. They will leave as club legends.

It’s a big night for Fulham, too, as they push for Europe. They’ve caused Liverpool plenty of problems in recent seasons.

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:30

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Reminder of Liverpool v Fulham team news and how to watch

Liverpool XI: Mamardashvili, Frimpong, Van Dijk, Konate, Robertson, Szoboszlai, Jones, Ngumoha, Wirtz, Salah, Gakpo

Fulham XI: Leno, Castagne, Andersen, Bassey, Robinson, Berge, Iwobi, Wilson, King, Bobb, Muniz

Viewers in the UK can watch the match on Sky Sports Main Event and Sky Sports Premier League. If you’re not a Sky customer, you can grab a NOWTV Day Pass here to watch without a subscription.

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:27

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How badly does Arne Slot need a result today?

Liverpool have just one win in their last six games in all competitions, as well as losing their last three in a row away to Brighton, Manchester City and Paris Saint-Germain.

Their Premier League form, since the start of March, is one point from a possible nine in games against Wolves, Tottenham and Brighton.

Today is must-win, surely? “If you play for Liverpool every game is a must-win,” Slot told Sky Sports.

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“I knew that before and definitely know that now. That is being part of a big club.”

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:22

Arne Slot explains Liverpool changes between PSG legs

Liverpool head coach Arne Slot, speaking to Sky Sports, on his team selection to face Fulham and the decision to make five changes.

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“The changes make sense after the week we’ve had, it’s been a demanding week with only a two-day turnaround, again.

“With everything coming up I tried to use the session yesterday to see who was well enough recovered to play. Some just have to play again as I’m out of options in that position.”

(Liverpool FC via Getty Images)
(Liverpool FC via Getty Images)

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:15

Today’s Premier League results as European battle heats up

Bournemouth’s win at Arsenal, a 2-2 draw between Brentford and Everton and Brighton’s 2-0 win at Burnley means the battle for Europe has got even tighter! Fulham have dropped to 11th without kicking a ball but would go just two points off 5th with a win at Anfield.

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(Action Images via Reuters)

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:13

Liverpool fans to stage series of protests against ticket price rises

Liverpool fans are to stage a series of protests against ticket price rises made in the face of “overwhelming opposition” from supporters, starting with today’s match against Fulham.

Late last month it was announced general admission tickets would rise in line with inflation for the next three seasons, despite discussions with the Supporters’ Board, who petitioned for a freeze.

In announcing the new plan, the club – which last season made a profit after tax of £8m – cited matchday operating costs which have risen 85 per cent since 2016-17.

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It has led to supporters group Spirit of Shankly (SoS) hastily arranging protests, which will “grow and escalate” starting from today’s match against the Cottagers.

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:10

Marco Silva on Fulham’s motivation for the rest of the season

“The motivation is there on the top, for us and all the clubs around. Last season we were close, fighting to the last months to achieve it.

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“This season we are repeating it and that shows the progression of the football club…If we are there we are going to fight definitely.”

“The importance of each game is going to be bigger than before because we are just going to have seven games to play.

“And I said the motivation is there on the top as you’d expect. We fought very hard to be in this position right now.”

According to Opta, Fulham have won just two of their 32 away league games against Liverpool (D8 L22), winning 1-0 in both May 2012 and March 2021.

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Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 17:00

Arne Slot insists he feels ‘a lot of support’ from Liverpool owners

Liverpool manager Arne Slot insists he feels “a lot of support” from the club hierarchy ahead of a pivotal eight days that includes a Merseyside derby and the second leg of their Champions League tie against Paris Saint-Germain and this afternoon’s match with Fulham.

“Not only from the owners but from Richard [Hughes] and Michael [Edwards], a lot of support from them as well but as weird as it might sound I also feel the support from the fans,” Slot said.

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“We were going out in Paris when the players went out for the warm-up and after the 4-0 loss [against Manchester City] the fans immediately started singing ‘we love Liverpool’.

“I think it’s fair to say we were outplayed for 90 minutes and they were still singing and clapping for us. I’ve said many times, the club knows the period of time we’re in and in the mean time I feel complete support.”

(Getty)

Jamie Braidwood11 April 2026 16:45

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NewsBeat

Ceasefire in doubt as Russia targets Ukrainian positions with drones

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Ceasefire in doubt as Russia targets Ukrainian positions with drones

KYIV, Ukraine (AP) — Russia continued to strike Ukrainian positions with drones after a Kremlin-declared Easter ceasefire took effect on Saturday, a Ukrainian military officer told The Associated Press.

“The ceasefire is not being observed by the Russian side,” said Serhii Kolesnychenko, a communications officer for the 148th Separate Artillery Brigade.

He said that while artillery fire had paused in the sector where his brigade was working, at the junction of the Donetsk, Dnipropetrovsk, and Zaporizhzhia regions, Russian forces continued to use drones to strike Ukrainian positions.

Ukrainian forces were responding with “silence to silence and fire to fire,” Kolesnychenko said.

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Russian President Vladimir Putin on Thursday declared a 32-hour ceasefire over the Orthodox Easter weekend, ordering Russian forces to halt hostilities from 4 p.m. on Saturday until the end of Sunday.

Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy promised to abide by the ceasefire, describing it as an opportunity to build on peace initiatives. But he warned there would be a swift military response to any violations.

“Easter should be a time of silence and safety. A ceasefire (at) Easter could also become the beginning of real movement toward peace,” Zelenskyy wrote in an online post on Saturday.

But he added: “We all understand who we are dealing with. Ukraine will adhere to the ceasefire and respond strictly in kind.”

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Ukraine earlier proposed to Russia a pause in attacks on each other’s energy infrastructure over the Orthodox Easter holiday.

Previous ceasefire attempts have had little impact, with both sides accusing each other of violations.

Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov on Friday described Putin’s move as a “humanitarian” gesture, but said Moscow remains focused on a comprehensive settlement based on its longstanding demands — a key sticking point that has prevented the two sides from reaching an agreement.

Deaths in Odesa and Kherson ahead of ceasefire

Hours before the ceasefire was due to begin, Russian drone strikes overnight killed at least two people in the Ukrainian city of Odesa, local authorities reported.

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A further two people were wounded in the attack on the Black Sea port city, when drones hit a residential area, damaging apartment buildings, houses and a kindergarten.

The driver of a public trolley bus was killed after the vehicle was struck by a drone in the southern Ukrainian city of Kherson, less than an hour before the start of the ceasefire, Kherson regional head Oleksandr Prokudin wrote on Telegram.

According to the Ukrainian Air Force, Russia targeted Ukraine with 160 drones overnight, of which 133 were shot down or intercepted, hours before a proposed Easter ceasefire was due to come into force.

Russia’s Defense Ministry said 99 Ukrainian drones were shot down overnight across Russia and occupied Crimea.

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Prisoners exchanged

Russia’s Defense Ministry said that a prisoner swap Saturday brought home 175 of its soldiers. Zelenskyy confirmed Saturday’s exchange, saying that 175 service members and seven civilians were returned. “Most had been held in captivity since 2022. And finally, they are home,” he wrote on X.

Hundreds of relatives, clutching photos of missing soldiers, crowded around ambulances and buses carrying returned prisoners of war in northern Ukraine. Many called out names and brigade numbers in hopes of finding loved ones faster.

The crowd, many draped in blue and yellow flags, chanted “We welcome you!” as the weary returnees in blue jackets reached through windows to shake hands and embrace well-wishers. Family also members held up portraits of others still-missing, asking the freed prisoners whether they recognized anyone.

Svitlana Pohosyan was waiting for her son’s return. Asked about the ceasefire, she said: “I want to believe it. God willing, may it be so. We will believe and hope that everything will be fine, that a ceasefire will come on such a holy day, and that there will be peace — peace in Ukraine and peace in the whole world.”

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“My celebration will come when my son returns,” she added. “I will hold him in my arms — and that will be the greatest celebration for me. And for every mother, every family.”

Periodic prisoner exchanges have been one of the few positive outcomes of otherwise fruitless monthslong U.S.-brokered negotiations between Moscow and Kyiv. The talks have delivered no progress on key issues preventing an end to Russia’s invasion of its neighbor, now in its fifth year.

Separately, seven residents of Russia’s Kursk region returned from Ukraine on Saturday after they were captured by the Ukrainian army, Russian state media reported. They were greeted at the Belarusian-Ukrainian border by Russia’s human rights ombudswoman, Tatyana Moskalkova.

According to Moskalkova, the returnees were the last of those who were taken to Ukraine from the Kursk region after the Ukrainian army took control of parts of the region in 2024.

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Ukrainian forces made a surprise incursion into Kursk in August 2024 in one of their biggest battlefield successes in the war. The incursion was the first time Russian territory was occupied by an invader since World War II and dealt a humiliating blow to the Kremlin.

___

Zhyhinas reported from northern Ukraine. Morton reported from London.

___

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Follow AP’s coverage of the war in Ukraine at https://apnews.com/hub/russia-ukraine

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Newscast – US-Iran Peace Talks + Artemis II Returns

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Newscast - Epstein Files: New Mandelson and Andrew Allegations

Available for over a year

There are two massive stories to chat through today – the start of direct trilateral talks between the US and Iran in Pakistan, and the return of Nasa’s Artemis II crew.

Paddy and Laura are on holiday so Newsnight’s Victoria Derbyshire and Nick Watt host.

To chat through news from Pakistan, they’re joined by Panorama filmmaker and foreign affairs and peace talks specialist Jane Corbin.

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And to explain what it’s like to return to earth from space, British astronaut Tim Peake.

You can now listen to Newscast on a smart speaker. If you want to listen, just say “Ask BBC Sounds to play Newscast”. It works on most smart speakers.

You can join our Newscast online community here: https://bbc.in/newscastdiscord

Get in touch with Newscast by emailing newscast@bbc.co.uk or send us a WhatsApp on +44 0330 123 9480.

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New episodes released every day. If you’re in the UK, for more News and Current Affairs podcasts from the BBC, listen on BBC Sounds: https://bbc.in/4guXgXd

Newscast brings you daily analysis of the latest political news stories from the BBC. The hosts were Victoria Derbyshire and Nick Watt. It was made by Chris Flynn with Chloe Scannapieco. The social producer was Grace Braddock. The technical producer was Michael Regaard. The assistant editor is Chris Gray. The senior news editor is Sam Bonham.

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