I’m 40 and work 2 jobs. How are we still broke?

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich talks to Gabriella, 36, and Chris, 40, a married couple from Pennsylvania with four kids and over a decade of financial struggle behind them. They both work multiple jobs. Chris travels all week as an electrician and picks up brewery shifts on weekends. Gabriella manages three income streams while running the household alone. And yet they have zero savings, $32,000 in credit card debt, and fixed costs sitting at 109% of their income.

But the numbers are only part of the story. What Ramit uncovers is a marriage where 95% of their relationship with money has never been spoken about out loud. Gabriella has been managing everything alone for years, silently building budgets Chris never looks at, covering purchases she didn’t agree to, and slowly losing hope. Chris has been avoiding the conversation entirely. And underneath all of it is a secret neither of them mentioned in the application: they’ve been here before. They filed for bankruptcy. And now, with four kids, they’re on the exact same trajectory again.

In this episode we uncover:
– Why two incomes and two extra jobs still aren’t enough when your fixed costs are 109%
– The treadmill purchase that broke Gabriella’s trust
– What Ramit means by “95% of your money relationship is in the shadows”
– The bankruptcy reveal that changes everything
– Why Chris can’t give a straight answer and what it’s costing the marriage
– The moment Gabriella admits she stopped doing everything just to see what would happen
– How Gabriella’s new $70K job changes the numbers overnight
– The Florida plan and why Ramit says it won’t fix anything
– What it looks like when a couple finally starts working as a team

⏩ CHAPTERS
(00:00:00) “I’ve never not worried about money in our marriage”
(00:07:10) Do you have trust issues around money?
(00:15:18) “What if you just stopped doing it all?”
(00:17:32) “95% of our relationship with money is in the shadows”
(00:22:17) Ramit reads the separation ultimatum from her application
(00:34:00) The power dynamic: who earns more, who leads?
(00:46:05) “So you all are broke”
(00:52:27) The bankruptcy reveal
(01:00:36) The Florida plan and why it won’t fix anything
(01:03:31) Gabriella’s new income changes everything
(01:05:57) “I’m too tired of being alone”
(01:58:09) Follow-ups

💡 RAMIT’S PODCAST NEWSLETTER
I share new ways to think about money every Saturday. Get the emails here: https://iwt.com/podcastnewsletter

🙌 GET HELP FROM RAMIT SETHI
Order my new book: Money for Couples: https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples
Take control of your money with the Conscious Spending Plan: https://iwt.com/csp
Optimize your credit cards with the 1st chapter of my book: https://iwt.com/chapter1-pod
Join my Money Coaching program for monthly help: https://iwt.com/moneycoaching
Listen to my book now on Audible: https://amzn.to/48zko28

🤳 CONNECT WITH RAMIT SETHI
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ramit/
X: https://twitter.com/ramit

✅ SUBSCRIBE SO YOU DON’T MISS ANY EPISODES
https://youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured/

THIS EPISODE IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit

DeleteMe | Get 20% off all consumer plans when you go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit and use promo code RAMIT at checkout

ZocDoc | Go to https://zocdoc.com/ramit to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored

Facet | As of the date of this recording, Facet is waiving the enrollment fee for new annual members, and for my audience, Facet is offering $300 into your brokerage account if you invest and maintain $5,000 within your first 90 days. Head to facet.com/ramit to learn more about which membership option is best for you. Offer has been extended to 12/31/2026. #FacetAd

If you or your partner get stressed spending $150 on dinner, or are covering up spending, I’d like to help. Apply to be coached for free on this podcast at iwt.com/apply

Calling LA couples: Apply to be coached for free on this podcast at https://iwt.com/apply

source