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Neurodivergence And Eating Struggles: How To Cope As A Parent

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Gee Eltringham

With a background in cooking and TV (I’ve cooked for the Royal family, and worked alongside Gordon Ramsay, Nigella Lawson and Jamie Oliver), feeding my child was something I thought I’d find easy.

But it was nothing like I’d imagined as an idealistic new parent. It ended up becoming a daily test of courage and survival.

Our child has ADHD with what I would call an anxiety profile, and they were born with a rare allergy condition called food protein-induced enterocolitis syndrome (FPIES).

It’s not like the allergies you read about in pregnancy books or parenting blogs. It’s severe, silent, and terrifying.

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From the very start, we faced impossible choices. As a newborn, they had horrendous silent reflux, sometimes turning blue in their sleep. One professor told me there was nothing more to do, dismissing my concerns with flippant advice about ‘needing a large glass of champagne to relax’. It was crushing.

When we began weaning at four months, hoping for joy and curiosity, it turned into a nightmare. By six months, vomiting could leave them unconscious, cold, and in shock. Every new food became a potential danger.

We had to go back to single-ingredient weaning until we found the trigger: bean protein, which is in nearly everything.

Gee Eltringham

That early trauma shaped our child’s relationship with food. What began as survival became avoidance. They became a “fussy eater”, not because of preference, but because their nervous system was wired to protect them. They were learning that food could kill and every meal carried a memory of that danger and trauma.

As they grew, ADHD and anxiety added another layer. The brain seeks dopamine, and often finds it in sugar, fat, salt, and carbohydrates.

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Patterns emerge: repeated textures, colours, or shapes are comforting. Anything unpredictable can feel unsafe. This isn’t picky eating. This is a nervous system regulation issue.

The same is true for many neurodiverse children. Our child may be ‘picky’ and have preferred foods, especially when dysregulated, but for others there is a diagnosis called avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) which is being diagnosed more frequently, but is still misunderstood.

ARFID is an eating disorder characterised by very limited food choices, either by volume or variety. But it’s not just about a child liking just chips, it goes as far as a specific brand of chips, cooked in a specific way, served on a specific plate, etc. The results of AFRID can be devastating, with nutritional deficiencies, weight loss and psychosocial impairment.

Where the driving force of anorexia is image, ARFID is about sensory sensitivities to taste, texture and looks. It is based on fear or a complete lack of interest in food or low appetite, which often goes hand-in-hand with weak interoception seen in children with autism.

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It is about predictability – the same packet of crisps is always the same packet of crisps. But a strawberry one day may be hard and crunchy, big and juicy; the next it might be small, squashy, and not so red. That takes a huge amount of decoding in the brain to check if it is safe to eat.

There is now an official route to diagnosis, but getting a diagnosis can be hard and time consuming, let alone treatment. The latter is a slow process too, as there is no quick fix and it often involves a multidisciplinary team of paediatricians and therapists.

As a parent whose child does not eat how I imagined they would, it all comes with a level of disappointment, if I am honest, and social shame when they won’t eat this and that. There’s also a level of stress when the decision comes down to crisps for breakfast, or nothing.

While I don’t have the answers to solving eating issues, I can share some of the things that have helped us:

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1. A fed child is a fed child

Calories first, “the socially acceptable” choices second. Whether it’s crisps for breakfast or eggs on toast, it’s better than nothing.

2. Remove pressure

The job of a parent is to provide food (mainly safe foods with the opportunity to try it). The child’s job is to eat it or not. No rewards, no punishments, no coercion.

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3. Predictable portions of joy

Most (75-95%) of the plate should be familiar, safe foods. A small portion of something new is enough for exploration, but with no pressure.

4. Family-style meals

Even if they eat separately, leaving a variety of food on the table helps them engage at their own pace.

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5. Reduce cognitive load

Sit in a calm environment, avoid screens, follow simple mealtime routines. Screens sometimes have to be used, but if your child is able to eat without one then it’s a good habit to get into because it stops unconscious eating (which means the learning around food is not happening).

6. Low-key praise

Often when our children achieve something, like trying a new food, we lay the praise on thick. When our children are neurodiverse this adds pressure and expectation for the next time.

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One single, low-key, specific praise point will be enough, and remember to praise the behaviour you want to see more of, not the end results. You could say something like: “You overcame your worries about picking up that food, great job for giving it ago.”

At the parental support platform I developed, twigged, we’ve even created food tasting boards to help families navigate new food tries without pressure, while reminding them that progress takes time. According to Connections In Mind, a child with neurodivergence may need 250 exposures to feel safe with trying new foods.

For families navigating eating struggles such as ARFID; caregivers might want to aim for safety, removing pressure and celebrating the small wins quietly.

I always recommend seeking out parental support networks like ARFID groups on Facebook, or other SEN parenting groups.

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Food is about fuel, connection, and learning to feel safe in your body. And above all, know this: your child’s eating challenges are not your fault. They are part of their unique profile.

Gee Eltringham is a SEN psychotherapist and founder of parental support platform for ADHD, twigged.

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‘Mamdani is a monster’ – spiked

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‘Mamdani is a monster’ - spiked

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‘Mother Of All U-Turns’: Starmer Slammed After Trump Allowed To Expand Use Of RAF Bases To Bomb Iran

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'Mother Of All U-Turns': Starmer Slammed After Trump Allowed To Expand Use Of RAF Bases To Bomb Iran

Keir Starmer has been accused of the “mother of all U-turns” after giving the US the green light to expand their use of RAF bases to bomb Iran.

Downing Street announced that American jets will be allowed to use British bases to strike sites targeting the Strait of Hormuz.

It marks a significant shift in the government’s approach to the UK’s involvement in the war.

Starmer initially refused Donald Trump’s request to use RAF bases to bomb Iran at the start of the war.

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However, the prime minister then decided to allow them to launch “defensive” missions against missile launch sites.

A Downing Street spokesman said those attacks can now be expanded as part of efforts to re-open the Strait of Hormuz, which carries around one-fifth of the global oil supply.

Its closure due to attacks by Iran on oil tankers has sent the price of oil soaring and sparked fears of a global economic crisis.

The No.10 spokesman said: ”[Ministers] confirmed that the agreement for the US to use UK bases in the collective self-defence of the region includes US defensive operations to degrade the missile sites and capabilities being used to attack ships in the Strait of Hormuz.

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“They reaffirmed that the principles behind the UK’s approach to the conflict remain the same: the UK remains committed to defending our people, our interests and our allies, acting in accordance with international law and not getting drawn into the wider conflict.

“Ministers underlined the need for urgent de-escalation and a swift resolution to the war.”

Despite the shift in the UK’s position, Trump told reporters Starmer “should have acted a lot faster”.

Posting on X, Tory leader Kemi Badenoch said the PM had performed “the mother of all U-turns”.

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Shadow defence secretary James Cartlidge added: “After weeks of dither and finger pointing, the prime minister has once again changed his mind and performed yet another screeching U-turn.

“The prime minister had the Navy’s only active minesweeper taken out of the Gulf a week before the war began. He dithered about sending a warship to help defend our base in Cyprus. And where we have been clear from the outset that we would have allowed our closest military ally to use our bases, Starmer has been all over the place.

“When we need strong leadership in challenging times, Starmer is weak and indecisive.”

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Jenni Murray, Long-Serving Woman’s Hour Presenter, Dies Aged 75

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Jenni Murray, Long-Serving Woman's Hour Presenter, Dies Aged 75

Dame Jenni Murray, the veteran journalist best known as the longest-serving host of the BBC’s Woman’s Hour, has died at the age of 75.

In a post on the Radio 4 show’s Instagram page on Friday evening, the channel’s controller Mohit Bakaya said: “Jenni Murray was a formidable voice in British broadcasting who was warm, fearless and beloved by listeners.

“During her decades at Woman’s Hour, she helped shape the national conversation with intelligence, rigour and a remarkable ability to connect with audiences. Jenni leaves an indelible legacy on generations of listeners.

“We are profoundly grateful for her outstanding contribution to Radio 4, and she will be deeply missed.”

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Dame Jenni began presenting Woman’s Hour in 1987, before officially stepping down more than 30 years later, in October 2020.

Prior to that, she had worked at other flagship BBC shows including Newsnight and Radio 4’s Today Show.

She continued to work in journalism following her Woman’s Hour departure, writing for the likes of the Daily Mail and Saga magazine.

In 2011, she was awarded a damehood by the late Queen Elizabeth II for services to broadcasting.

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The BBC’s outgoing director-general Tim Davie also paid his respects on Friday, saying: “This is incredibly sad news and our thoughts are with all of Dame Jenni’s family and friends. Dame Jenni was, simply put, a broadcasting icon.

“Throughout her three groundbreaking decades on Woman’s Hour, Jenni created a safe space for her audience thanks to her warmth, intelligence and courage.

“We shall all miss her terribly. Her legacy endures in the countless conversations she started, the many issues she championed and the lives she touched.”

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The House Article | Regulation is the key to the lobbying industry’s PR problem

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Regulation is the key to the lobbying industry’s PR problem
Regulation is the key to the lobbying industry’s PR problem


4 min read

Once again in recent weeks, lobbying has made the headlines and, regrettably, not for the right reasons.

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Each new scandal reinforces a narrative that influence is traded in the shadows and that standards in our profession are optional. They are not. Integrity is not a bolt-on to public affairs – it is the foundation of it.

But moments like these should not simply prompt outrage. They should prompt reform.

Lobbying, when conducted openly and responsibly, is a vital part of a healthy democracy. It advocates for better legislation, strengthens decision-making and ensures diverse voices are heard. Public affairs, at its best, builds constructive and lasting relationships between business and government that result in stronger legislation and regulation.

Governments too recognise the value of lobbying. As the consultation on the establishment of statutory regulation said: “Lobbying serves an important function in politics – by putting forward the views of stakeholders to policy makers, it helps in the development of better legislation. But it needs to be open and transparent.”

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Better legislation affects every aspect of our lives. From fire regulations to tax policy, from the distribution of benefits to transport, education and building standards, public policy sits at the core of how our society functions. Representative, well-informed lawmaking depends on policymakers hearing from those with expertise, experience and evidence to offer. That is authentic advocacy.

Yet there is often confusion about where the line sits between legitimate advocacy and grubby lobbying. Too often, companies themselves are uncertain. As a result, many organisations hesitate to put their heads above the parapet to challenge bad policy or propose better solutions, fearing reputational risk by association.

This confusion is compounded by a regulatory framework that is simply not fit for purpose.

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The UK’s existing legislation, centred on the Transparency of Lobbying, Non-Party Campaigning and Trade Union Administration Act 2014, was introduced by the Coalition government following concerns about lobbying transparency.

The resulting act aimed to improve transparency, but its scope is narrow. It captures only consultant lobbyists hired externally, while the vast majority of lobbying activity is conducted in-house by companies, charities and trade bodies and therefore falls outside its remit.

The legislation was never designed to operate in isolation. It was intended to sit alongside wider transparency measures, including quarterly departmental disclosures of ministers’ and senior officials’ meetings, gifts and hospitality.

The Registrar of Consultant Lobbyists also encourages adherence to recognised voluntary codes of conduct, such as those of the Public Relations and Communications Association (PRCA) and other professional bodies, as an indicator of good practice. Even taken together, however, these mechanisms remain fragmented.

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As a standalone statutory safeguard, the act is insufficient: it lacks both the breadth and the independence required to command sustained public confidence.

Transparency around who is lobbying whom, and on what issues, strengthens public trust. It ensures that decision making takes place openly and responsibly. Without it, suspicion festers and responsible practitioners are tarnished by the actions of the few.

The answer is not to vilify lobbying, nor to pretend that engagement between policymakers and external organisations is inherently suspect. A healthy democracy depends on that engagement. The answer is stronger, clearer and more coherent regulation that applies consistently across the board whether the engagement comes from business, charities, non-governmental organisations or anyone else.

The PRCA supports decisive government action to strengthen integrity in lobbying. The newly formed Ethics and Integrity Commission must be given the powers it needs to design and enforce meaningful reform, backed by credible and independent oversight.

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As a professional body, the PRCA stands firm for higher standards. We challenge bad practice, champion transparency and provide our industry with a principled voice. Our Code for Professional Lobbying, alongside our broader Code of Conduct, sets an uncompromising benchmark for ethical practice.

Regulation alone will not solve the industry’s reputational challenges. But clear rules, properly enforced, create the conditions in which ethical practice can succeed and misconduct can be rooted out. 

Sarah Waddington is CEO of the PRCA

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Is Nick Timothy right about public Islamic prayer?

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Is Nick Timothy right about public Islamic prayer?

The post Is Nick Timothy right about public Islamic prayer? appeared first on spiked.

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The Manosphere moral panic – spiked

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The Manosphere moral panic - spiked

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Guido Whispers: Bell Ends Up Hiring?

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Guido Whispers: Bell Ends Up Hiring?

Members get access to Guido Whispers every Friday. For all the latest gossip swirling around Westminster and beyond, join us today by clicking here. Get tomorrow’s news, today…

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Labour At War As Angela Rayner Launches Leadership Race

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Angela Rayner has spoken out against Shabana Mahmood's immigration reforms.

As leadership election launches ago, it was pretty inauspicious.

Fewer than a dozen Labour MPs were present as Angela Rayner got to her feet in the basement of a Whitehall pub to make it clear she wants to replace Keir Starmer as prime minister.

Addressing the soft-left campaign group Mainstream’s spring reception, the former deputy PM said the government was “running out of time” to deliver the change Labour promised before the election.

“It needs to be felt, and we have to show that it’s a Labour government that will deliver it,” Rayner declared, before going on to take aim at home secretary Shabana Mahmood’s immigration crackdown.

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Plans to double the length of time it takes for migrants – including two million who are already in the UK – to be granted permanent residency are “un-British”, Rayner said.

“That would not just be bad policy, but a breach of trust,” she told those present. “The people already in the system who made a huge investment now fear for their future.

“We cannot talk about earning a settlement if we keep moving the goalposts because moving the goalposts undermines a sense of fair play.”

Sources close to Rayner have also let it be known that the HMRC investigation into her tax affairs – the main impediment to any leadership bid – will be dealt with in time for the UK-wide elections on May 7.

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By happy coincidence, that is when Starmer is expected to face moves to unseat him, assuming the results in Scotland, Wales and England are as catastrophic for the party as the opinion polls suggest.

Labour MP Karl Turner told HuffPost UK this week: “If we do badly in Scotland, Wales and up and down regions of England the PM will undoubtedly face a challenge.”

Rayner’s blatant manoeuvring has triggered an angry backlash from many Labour figures, not least those who saw her up close when she was the Secretary of State for Housing, Communities and Local Government.

“She wasn’t up to running her department, never mind the country,” said one former aide. “She couldn’t even get the bins emptied in Birmingham.”

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That is a reference to the long-running strike by refuse workers in England’s second biggest city.

“She used to sit in meetings and ask why the strike was going on, when ending it was literally her job.”

Even if she is cleared by the taxman, the fact that she was forced to resign from government for failing to pay the right amount of stamp duty will continue to haunt her.

A Labour source said: “Making Angie prime minister isn’t going to make things any better for the party because most voters think she doesn’t pay her tax.”

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Angela Rayner has spoken out against Shabana Mahmood's immigration reforms.
Angela Rayner has spoken out against Shabana Mahmood’s immigration reforms.

One senior party insider said they were baffled that Rayner had chosen to criticise Mahmood’s immigration reforms.

“The public support for what Shabana is doing is enormous, it’s probably the most popular thing the government is doing,” he said.

“The party will struggle to get a hearing if it suddenly changes its mind on something with such strong public support. There is absolutely no sign out there that the public think this is something that they have to change.

“This is the territory Labour gets itself into all the time – talking to itself rather than to the country at large.”

Writing in The Guardian, Rayner pointed out that centre-left parties in Canada, Australia and Norway “surged back to win again” in the face of challenges from right-wing populists.

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“They showed they would tackle the issues that mattered most to people, and voters decided that a progressive government that puts people first and lowers costs for ordinary people was the better choice,” she wrote.

But one Labour MP said: “Her comparisons to Norway, Australia and Canada undermine her fundamental thesis – that there needs to now be a change because time is of the essence.

“In each country Rayner cites, the governing party bounced back in the final year of the parliamentary term before going on to win.

“This is a view which seeks to falsely cherry pick countries, ignoring the dramatic fall in support for centre left parties across advanced democracies in Europe – whether it be in France, in Germany or in Italy.”

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Another backbencher said: “Where’s Angela’s vision? It’s all very well criticising, but there’s no substance.

“What would she do to tackle the energy crisis, the geopolitical headwinds, or young people not in work, education or training? She’s got nothing to say on any of those things.”

Although it may still seem unlikely, there is a small but growing body of opinion within Labour that Starmer may still be leader long after May 7.

“At the moment, he’s the least worst option,” a Labour veteran told HuffPost UK.

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“A lot of people doubt whether Rayner’s up to it, and there’s a suspicion that Wes [Streeting] is all style and no substance. Andy Burnham can’t even get a seat so he’s out of the equation.

“Out of them all I’d probably favour Shabana, but the immigration stuff puts me off. Sending girls back to Afghanistan is beyond the pale, in my opinion.”

“There is definitely a world in which Keir is still there at the end of the year,” said a former Labour adviser.

“The right of the party have worked out none of their candidates stand a chance of winning with the members, and the left are getting everything they want from Starmer anyway, so why bother changing it?”

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Angela Rayner has fired the starting gun on the race to succeed Starmer. It is yet to be seen whether she will make it to the finishing line.

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The Best Dishes To Make With Rhubarb

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The Best Dishes To Make With Rhubarb

Comment provided by Kit Delamain, head chef at Circus Pizza, Panzer’s, Stuart Gillies, chef-owner for Number Eight, Sevenoaks and Bank House, Chislehurst, and Zoe Gill, development chef at Brakes Foodservices.

Great news for fellow bakers – though we’re reaching the end of winter’s forced rhubarb harvest, most other varieties are almost in season, and will remain at their best until June.

The tangy treat, which is technically a vegetable, is a favourite among home cooks and chefs alike. So, we thought we’d ask some pros, namely, chefs Stuart Gillies, Zoe Gill, and Kit Delamain, to share their favourite dish involving rhubarb.

Stuart Gillies: a classic crumble

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“At this time of year, rhubarb really takes centre stage, and I like to use it in a crumble with apple and oats,” Gillies told us.

That way, “its natural sharpness is the hero, balanced gently with sweetness and finished with a crisp, buttery topping”.

We’ve written before at HuffPost UK about why you should consider baking, rather than stewing, your rhubarb, as well as the best crumble topping we’ve tried so far.

Zoe Gill: pork chops with rhubarb compote

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Sweet is not the only option here, the chef told us.

“Rhubarb is a great ingredient to pair with a pork dish. When cooked down into a compote, it works really well as a substitute for pear or apple sauce,” she explained.

“Its tangy, sharp taste acts as a great contrast to the fattiness of a pork belly or chops, especially with a touch of honey and herbs.”

Then, there’s the nutritional element to consider.

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“Rhubarb is also high in fibre, vitamin C and calcium, so it can be considered a healthy accompaniment,” Gill said.

“I would recommend serving with seasonal vegetables like asparagus, carrots or broad beans and a side of roasted or boiled Jersey royal potatoes.”

Kit Delamain: a rhubarb pizza (yes, really)

The pizza chef, who really seems to stand by his craft, said: “We went up to Leeds in February to secure the pink gold, the English champagne, Yorkshire forced rhubarb.

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“We could see no better use for it than to spruce up our already divisive custard pizza, made with vanilla to pair with our limited rhubarb. It’s a big pink custard tart.”

If you don’t fancy proving your own dough, though, a custard and rhubarb tart is a beautiful and surprisingly simple thing: BBC Good Food’s gingery recipe is incredibly well-reviewed.

(Don’t tell the chefs, but both us and them recommend premade shortcrust for the job).

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Donald Trump Calls NATO Members Cowards Over Strait Of Hormuz

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Donald Trump Calls NATO Members Cowards Over Strait Of Hormuz

The US president described the military alliance as “a paper tiger” in his latest rant on Truth Social.

His comments came nearly three weeks after America and Israel started bombing Iran and amid warnings that he is “losing control” of the conflict.

The Iranian regime has effectively shut down the Strait – which carries around one-fifth of the world’s oil supply – by launching missile and drone attacks on ships trying to use it.

That has led to a spike in oil prices and sparked fears of a global economic meltdown.

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Trump has previously called on countries – including the UK – to send warships to the region to deter the Iranian attacks, but they have all so far declined.

The president said: “Without the U.S.A., NATO IS A PAPER TIGER! They didn’t want to join the fight to stop a Nuclear Powered Iran. Now that fight is Militarily WON, with very little danger for them, they complain about the high oil prices they are forced to pay, but don’t want to help open the Strait of Hormuz, a simple military maneuver that is the single reason for the high oil prices. So easy for them to do, with so little risk. COWARDS, and we will REMEMBER!”

Trump’s comments are at odds with his claim on Tuesday that “we don’t need any help” from Nato, which he said had abandoned the US “in its time of need”.

He said: “I wonder what would happen if we ‘finished off’ what’s left of the Iranian Terror State, and let the Countries that use it, we don’t, be responsible for the so called ‘Strait?’

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“That would get some of our non-responsive ‘Allies’ in gear, and fast!!!”

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