For a long time, there’s been a misconception that BDSM (bondage, dominance, sadism, submission, and masochism) is some kind of niche sexual fantasy.

Well, folks, I’m here to tell you that that is well and truly wrong. In fact, research shows that almost half (46%) of people have ever tried it, while an additional 22% have experienced fantasies about it.

If you so happen to fall into that category, you’ve come to the right place.

While BDSM has been increasingly romanticised in media over the last decade or so (think: Pillion, Fifty Shades of Grey, I could go on…) there is no handbook for how to get into it.

But some of the acts within BDSM come with risks, so to help you embark on your journey, we’ve consulted the experts for some beginner-friendly guidance.

We’ve also rounded up the best BDSM sex toys to get started with, from handcuffs to beginner BDSM sets.

As with anything sexual, it all starts with talking to your partner about your desires. “Talk about what you’ve fantasised about, what you’re not willing to explore and what you want to try together,” advised Tim Lagman, resident expert at sex toy store, pjur.

These conversations should also include ‘housekeeping rules’ like boundaries, hard limits, words that are triggering, and what you want to gain from the experience, according to Courtney Boyer, pjur’s resident clinical sex educator.

“These kinds of conversations beforehand often create more intimacy than the activity itself because it builds trust and emotional safety,” she explained.

Communication is particularly important because two thirds of women have had non-consensual experiences with BDSM acts, so you’ll want to make sure all parties are equally game for what you’re about to try out.

If you’re not sure what kind of fantasies you’re into, but want to try something new, you might want to explore BDSM communities such as FetLife to see what people are talking about, or watch ethical porn to get some ideas.

“You don’t have to earn a place in the kink community by trying the most extreme thing you can imagine,” Boyer explained.

“Ask yourself what genuinely sparks your curiosity rather than what you think you’re supposed to enjoy. Following your own desire, instead of someone else’s expectations, makes the experience far more enjoyable.”

If you’re completely new to BDSM, you might want to start by exploring one aspect at a time. This isn’t a race – so there’s no pressure to jump into anything straight away.

“Trying impact play, bondage, sensory deprivation, dirty talk, and power exchange all in one evening can quickly become overwhelming,” Boyer noted.

“Pick one new experience, keep it simple, and give yourselves permission to learn together.”

Low-intensity play is a great place to start, suggested Lagman. This could include removing one of your senses, such as your vision, with an eye mask, and experimenting with new sensations.

“Feathers, silky fabric, or even an ice cube can change how someone experiences touch,” Lagman said.

“Removing one sense can heighten another, making a familiar experience feel brand new. Starting slow also allows you to discover what excites you before investing in more expensive toys.

“If you’re using toys as part of the experience, pjur Toy Lube can help enhance the experience by giving your toys a slippery feel to enhance your sensation play.”

Once you’ve experimented with removing one of your senses, you might want to move on to other aspects of BDSM.

“BDSM includes an enormous range of experiences like blindfolds, temperature play, role play, and even a massage,” explained Lagman. “Sometimes the anticipation is more exciting than the intensity.”

If you are going to explore anything like rope tying, choking or impact play, it’s important to learn the safest way of engaging in these activities.

Websites like Beducated have great beginner courses for these activities. And remember: practise makes perfect, and that doesn’t mean you have to push your body to the extreme.

“Whether you’re experimenting with cuffs, sleeves, or other BDSM accessories, your body should never have to fight against the gear you’re using,” Boyer said.

Another fun way to explore BDSM is to buy a sex toy set and figure out how to use it together, using the expert tips above.

You don’t have to dive into anything extreme straight off the bat, but if you want to then at least you’ll have the option.

We’re always talking about foreplay (as we should be) but aftercare is just as important and fun – especially when exploring BDSM.

“Aftercare is intentionally reconnecting once the scene ends to help you get back to the real world slowly and gently,” Lagman explained.

“This could mean cuddling, watching TV together, spending time together quietly, being alone. Take as much time as you need to ground yourself. Some people need five minutes, others need five days. Both are okay.”

Parts of England and Wales are experiencing drought following an unbelievably dry summer and higher-than-usual water consumption.

As a result, many water suppliers have opted to enforce a temporary usage ban (TUB), also known as a hosepipe ban. This includes companies that haven’t introduced hosepipe bans in decades, like Wessex Water.

While recent temperatures have been far more forgiving, with rain and cooler air finally making their welcome way across the UK, this won’t be enough to offset the current drought conditions in place across multiple counties.

And speaking to Times Radio, Nevil Muncaster, strategic water resources director at Thames Water, has said that the hosepipe ban might last for longer than hoped.

“What we’ve seen with these heatwaves is temperatures going above 30°C and customers using 50% more water. And that’s a huge demand on top of our normal supplies, and something that we had to cope with and make sure that we deal with,” Muncaster explained.

That’s why Thames Water, along with so many water companies, have introduced TUBs.

But even when rainfall resumes, it’ll still take time to make up for the existing shortfall, never mind add to what would have been the usual reserves.

“The Environment Agency forecast is that it will be drier than normal for the next few months, but we’ll wait and see,” the expert added.

When asked how long it would be until Thames Water’s hosepipe ban let up, he answered: “I think realistically, it’s going to be towards the end of the year before that comes off. That’s something that we need to make sure we do just to protect the environment.”

The south and southeast of the UK (where Thames Water supplies millions of customers) have generally fared far worse than the north and northwest when it comes to water supplies this year.

In April, for instance, Esk Dumfries in Scotland received 103% of the long-term average rainfall, while South Essex got just 5%.

Therefore, not all of the UK is under a TUB, and some may end sooner than others.

Thames Water serves areas including all or parts of:

• Gloucestershire
• Wiltshire
• Surrey
• the Thames Valley
• Greater London and surrounding areas
• Essex.

Check with your local water supplier to see whether your area is under a TUB and what its rules are.

Andy Burnham has shrugged off queries about how the Duke and Duchess of Sussex will be protected once they return to the UK.

Harry and Meghan moved to the US in 2020 after choosing to step down from their royal duties but will be relocating to a non-royal residence outside of London later this month.

The Duke of Sussex, who is fifth in line to the British throne, lost a legal challenge over how much state-funded security he and his family are entitled to while in Britain last year.

His trip to the UK last month was even put on hold briefly after his request for policy protection was rejected.

The revelation that he is now bringing his wife and two children back to the UK has therefore come as a shock.

When asked how the non-working royals will be protected while in Britain, the prime minister said their security a “private matter”.

“Well, this is a private matter,” he told reporters while on a visit to West Yorkshire. “It’s a matter for for Harry and for Megan, and we wish them well in the moves that they’re making.”

Education secretary Lucy Powell also told LBC: “I think that the vast majority of your listeners will welcome that news and – they obviously are not working royals anymore – and want to come back to this country.

“I assume because we do have great schools, great education, that’s why many people do return to this country and choose this country to bring up their children in.

“And I hope that this is all part of a bigger reconciliation for the family because you know the royal family is very important to this country and to our reputation around the world, and you know I for one think it’s great to have Harry and Meghan and their family back here.”

Harry and Meghan’s children, seven-year-old Prince Archie and five-year-old Princess Lilibet, are in the line of succession behind their father.

They have been enrolled in a British school from September onwards, suggesting the Sussexes intend to be back in the UK for the long-haul.

Harry and his family went to visit his father King Charles in July in Highgrove, though it’s thought their move back to Britain was not discussed.

The monarch was reportedly only told about their decision to relocate on Sunday, though he is said to welcome the idea of seeing his family more in a personal capacity.

Harry and Meghan are expected to continue living as private individuals.

Their return to the UK comes six years after the Sussexes dramatically fell out with the Royal Family and moved across the Atlantic amid heightened press scrutiny.

While the couple’s relationship with Charles and his wife Queen Camilla appears to be on the mend after their July visit, it’s unclear if they have built bridges with the Prince and Princess of Wales.

The King had not see his grandchildren for more than four years prior to the Sussexes’ trip earlier this summer, and the Duke of Sussex previously said security fears had stopped him bringing his family to the UK.

Harry and Meghan have not been seen publicly in the UK since they attended the 2022 funeral of Queen Elizabeth II.

A Home Office spokesperson said decision on the security of royals were taken by the Executive Committee for the Protection of Royalty and Public Figures.

They said: “The UK government’s protective security system is rigorous and proportionate.

“It is our long-standing policy not to provide detailed information on those arrangements, as doing so could compromise their integrity and affect individuals’ security.”

The Home Office, the Metropolitan Police and the royal household all sit on that executive committee.

They work together to advise the independent chair in making decisions, based on expert risk assessments and in line with government policy.

Listen to Commons People, the podcast that makes politics easy. Every week, Kevin Schofield and Kate Nicholson unpack the week’s biggest stories to keep you informed. Join us for straightforward analysis of what’s going on at Westminster.

DJ and radio presenter Trevor Nelson has disclosed that he has been diagnosed with a brain tumour.

Back in June, Trevor announced he would be taking a step back from his work commitments on Radio 2 and Radio 1Xtra on medical grounds.

“After a routine check-up I was advised to have some follow up tests. As a result, I will be taking some further time off,” he said at the time. “As I’m sure you can appreciate with health issues, it’s important to deal with facts and not speculate.

“So I’m concentrating on getting better, being back to 100% me and to getting back behind the mic and the decks.”

On Thursday afternoon, Trevor shared a video on Instagram, explaining that he’d spent the last month at home recovering from brain surgery.

“A lot of you may have seen the post that I put up at the start of summer saying that I was stepping back from all my work commitments due to illness,” he began. “There’s been a lot of speculation as to what’s wrong with me, I know that much – my phone’s blown up 20 times over with people asking what’s wrong with me.

“Due to the love and positive vibes thousands of you have literally been sending me, I felt that I should at least tell you what was wrong with me, and what happened to me.”

He continued: “I’m not going to go into it all now, and I will probably deep dive into it at a later date, so you can hear the whole crazy story. But I’ll tell you this, I was minding my own business, and then it was discovered that I had a brain tumour.

“As you can imagine, I was shocked, in fact, my world was turned upside down. It was a shock to myself, my close family and friends, and you can imagine, quite literally, my head was all over the place.

“I knew I had to stop work because I couldn’t be that guy on the radio, knowing I had that going on. So affirmative action had to be taken, I was given my choices of what I could do, and a few weeks later, I had a very serious surgery. Thankfully, it went incredibly well, and in the last month, I’ve been at home, recuperating, resting and recovering, and getting some post-op treatment as well.”

Trevor insisted: “I can only tell you the truth, and the truth is, I feel great right now. I feel ready to come back, I feel energised, I feel almost back to myself. Yes, I’ve had a really serious situation, but I’ve come out the other side at this point. I feel great, I feel raring to go, and I feel in good health.

“I’m playing golf, I’m doing a bit of gym, I’m doing all the things that I normally used to do, bar being on the radio and doing gigs – so let’s get that straight, and let’s get that back to normal as soon as possible. So please, don’t worry about me. I’m on the mend, I really am.”

Trevor is currently a weekend presenter on Radio 2, and hosted a Sunday morning show on 1Xtra until his recent health issues.

Radio 2’s official Instagram account shared a message under Trevor’s post, which read: “Sending you so much love Trevor! Can’t wait to have you back.”

His former BBC colleague Clara Amfo said: “Thank God for your brilliant surgeons, you’re meant to be here UT! Love you.”

“So good to see your face Trevor and learn that you’re doing well. Huge healing love to you wonderful man,” wrote Zoe Ball, while Jack Saunders also commented: “So glad you’re feeling better [and] more like yourself mate. We need you. Sending all the love and can’t wait to have you back doing what you do best!”