Full disclosure: I have been a fan of Call My Agent! since 2015, when I saw the first two episodes at a small festival in Brides-les-bains, a spa town in the French Alps. The event was organised by agent-turned-producer Dominique Besnehard, who was showing the episodes ahead of their first airing on French TV.

Having spent eight years getting the project off the ground, Besnehard was anxious to know whether French audiences would like it. They did. The series ran for four seasons, was picked up by Netflix and critically well-received. It won several French TV awards and an International Emmy, with its formula later reproduced in the UK, Germany, Italy and Spain among others. Now comes the movie.

In the series, written by talented showrunner Fanny Herrero who also wrote the film, we observe the workings of Parisian casting agency ASK (modelled on Artmedia, where Besnehard worked) in light comedy mode. Agents match “the talent” with film projects, while coping with actorly egos, affairs, meltdowns and tantrums. The series’ key trick was to mix the fictional agency staff with real-life celebrities making fun of themselves.

Many major stars were reluctant to join the first series. There was no Catherine Deneuve or Gérard Depardieu, possibly for the best in the latter’s case (in the new film, his name is met with stony silence). Fans had to wait for seasons two and three to see A-listers like Juliette Binoche, Isabelle Huppert and Jean Dujardin, and season four for Charlotte Gainsbourg, Jean Reno and American actress Sigourney Weaver (playing a diva version of herself). In turn, the success of the series brought fame to its actors, especially Camille Cottin (Andréa) and Laure Calamy (Noémie).

There is evidence that great series do not automatically produce brilliant movies – see The Avengers (1998), Miami Vice (2006) and Sex and the City (2008). So could Call My Agent! pull off a movie version?

The one star problem

Season four of the series ended on the break-up of ASK. Five years on, the film picks up with Andréa about to direct her first full-length feature film and Noémie producing a TV series. Both work in the same company as their former boss, Mathias (Thibault de Montalembert), who is also Noémie’s partner. Predictably, things go awry.

Andréa’s star, Laurent Lafitte, drops out and she sacks her producer. After Noémie (who steps in as producer) wrecks the possibility of casting George Clooney by making a series of cringeworthy remarks that incense the Hollywood star, they recruit Vincent Macaigne, who plays a reputed, but fragile version of himself.

Things go from bad to worse when they all move to the south of France for the shoot, with lead actors punching each other, an unruly wild boar and a storm that destroys the equipment.

For fans of the series, there is fun to be had in the familiar banter among the team of former agents reunited for Andréa’s shoot. Each plays up to their established identity: Mathias continues to be a cad; Andréa bullies everyone while fighting with her lesbian ex-partner over their daughter; Noémie’s chaotic energy hides her professional skills; straight Gabriel (Grégory Montel) and gay Hervé (Nicolas Maury) channel their vulnerable masculinity; and veteran Arlette (Liliane Rovère) reveals more of her improbably eventful past.

The problem, not just for Andréa’s film but also the second half of Call My Agent! The Movie, is the featured “star”.

The reason for the series’ success, beyond gossipy shenanigans at a casting agency, is its deep roots in French cinema history. Sustaining 24 episodes is a rich film culture, with stars ranging from internet celebrities (Norman) to international figures (Binoche), auteur cinema divas (Isabelle Adjani), TV stars (Muriel Robin), comics (Frank Dubosc), the old (Guy Marchand) and the young (Julien Doré).

Boiling this down to one star in one film was a challenge to which Macaigne is not the solution. The film, which showcases Macaigne’s trademark depressive persona, never gives him an opportunity to display his craft – he is upstaged by both the wild boar and the storm.

Meanwhile, the input of his co-lead, former model Laetitia Casta, amounts to being punched on the nose. The “joke” that the policemen who arrest the couple at a demonstration do not recognise them may be a little close the bone.

To attain major stardom in France actors must straddle the rarefied world of auteur cinema and popular genres – as is the case, indeed, for Lafitte who would have been ideal star but unfortunately drops out of Andréa’s film. (In real life Laffite is an alumni of the prestigious Comédie Française theatre who stars in both art movies and popular comedies.)

As a result, despite glamorous cameos by Clooney and Eva Longoria, the film is unlikely to attract new viewers. Fans of Call My Agent! will continue to long for another season, but in the meantime they will have to be content with this watchable, but ultimately disappointing film.

The incident happened on Swinside Road in Breightmet, Bolton, at around 6pm on Wednesday, September 9, prompting a large emergency response and a police cordon at the scene.

Greater Manchester Fire and Rescue Service (GMFRS) confirmed that four fire engines were sent to the scene from Bolton North, Bolton Central, Farnworth, and Whitefield stations.

(Image: NQ)

A spokesperson for GMFRS said: “Just after 6pm on Wednesday 9 September, fire crews were called to reports of a fire at a home on Swinside Road, Bolton.

“Four fire engines from Bolton North, Bolton Central, Farnworth and Whitefield stations were quickly mobilised to the incident, which involved a fire in the kitchen of a ground-floor flat.

“Firefighters wearing breathing apparatus used two hose reels to extinguish the fire. A man was rescued from the property and has been taken to hospital by North West Ambulance Service.

“Fire crews were in attendance for about two hours.”

The man’s condition has not been disclosed.

The incident led to a significant emergency services presence in the area, with police maintaining a cordon around the property for several hours.

At least four police vehicles remained at the scene late into the evening, and officers were still present as of 9.28pm.

(Image: NQ)

Electricians were also called to the property to deal with live wires, and were seen entering the building at around 9.12pm.

The fire service had left the scene about an hour earlier, but police continued to secure the area while the investigation continued.

The fire is believed to have started in the kitchen of the flat.

A police cordon remained in place late into the night.

Dr Samantha Burgess, strategic lead for climate at Copernicus, described August as “a remarkable month in the global climate record”, and its impacts had been “increasingly being felt by communities, economies and ecosystems across the world”.

The combination of record air temperatures, record ocean heat and Europe’s exceptional summer showed how climate change was now driving extremes across “both the atmosphere and the oceans”, she said.

UN climate chief Simon Stiell said the record clearly showed humanity’s impact on the climate.

“The evidence is irrefutable: this is the spiralling price of humanity’s fossil fuel addiction, and the global climate crisis it is fuelling,” he said.

On top of the ongoing impact of the use of fossil fuels, the rise of a powerful El Niño is making matters worse, the researchers have said.

El Niño is a natural climate pattern in which a band of the eastern Pacific turns unusually warm, releasing vast amounts of stored ocean heat into the atmosphere and nudging global temperatures upwards for around a year.

The one currently being experienced is still strengthening and could become one of the most powerful on record, according to the Copernicus team.

The biggest impact of this natural phenomenon on global temperatures is expected to hit over the coming year, meaning the current run of records may have further to go.

As the new Telegraph Fantasy Football season approaches, the fantasy football experts at Fantasy Football Hub will continue to bring you the very best in fantasy football knowledge, tips and tools to help you rise up the ranks and win your mini-leagues.

To join the Hub and get access to all their great resources and expert tips you can take advantage of its 50% pre-season discount here.

 

New signings can be a slight risk to include in your very first starting XI. However, many teams got a lot of their business done early this year and there is always a thrill in the unknown of unearthing a potential new fantasy football star. Here are our top five to look out for this season:

 

Mamadou Sangaré (£3.1m)

Ever since the introduction of tackle bonuses, combative midfielders have found their place in the hearts of Telegraph Fantasy Football faithfuls. Brentford’s Malian international could prove to be the next Palhinha or Gomes, with a steady stream of bonuses expected alongside the odd attacking return.

 

Marco Palestra (£2.7m)

The exciting full-back has played the majority of minutes in pre-season under new Chelsea manager Xabi Alonso, showing a willingness to push high up the pitch. If the defensive and attacking returns come as expected, the 21-year-old could make a mockery of his cheap price-tag.

 

Gonzalo García (£3.7m)

No doubt influenced by his stint in the dugout at the Santiago Bernabéu, Arbeloa beat off stiff competition to land the former Real Madrid striker. At 6’ tall, the striker possesses the physical attributes, alongside the technical ability, to thrive in the Premier League. TFF managers will be targeting the GW6 to GW8 run, where the Cottagers play all three promoted clubs back-to-back, as a great entry point to transfer the Spaniard in.

 

Luka Vušković (£2.9m)

Brighton’s qualification for Europe was built on a solid defensive structure last season, and the ex-Tottenham centre-half has been brought in to fill the Van Hecke-sized hole in their back-line. The highly-regarded 19-year-old could be one of the bargains of the season if he lives up to his potential on the South Coast.

 

Tarik Muharemović (£2.7m)

TFF managers have a plethora of great value defensive assets to pick from this season, and the Bosnian could be the pick of the bunch. Having already demanded attention after scoring with an audacious bicycle-kick in pre-season, it won’t be a surprise to see the new Leeds no.5 in many final drafts.

 

Pick your team for the 2026/27 season >

You can follow the latest Telegraph Fantasy Football news and discussions throughout the year on Facebook, Twitter and Fantasy Football Content Hub.

May Edwards, a resident of Peterlee for more than 60 years, marked the milestone on Friday, September 4.

Born May Savage in Horden, she played a vital role during and after the Second World War, working at the miners’ hostel in Horden and supporting Bevin Boys – young men conscripted to work in Britain’s coal mines.

Mrs Edwards said: “I was proud of that job; it was my bit for the war effort.

“It was a paid job and I had a little room to sleep in.

“I was a canteen girl, helping in the kitchen and making tea and coffee for the lads, who were lovely and worked so hard.

“I had wanted to work in the munitions factory in Sheffield, but I wasn’t old enough.

May Edwards. (Image: Believe Housing)

“Looking back, it was for the best.”

She later worked in a drapery shop in Horden, where she met her future husband, Stanley Edwards, who worked at the nearby butcher’s.

The couple married in 1948 and later moved to Peterlee as the new town was being developed.

They raised two children, Alan and Glynis, in the home where Mrs Edwards still lives today.

Now widowed and a grandmother, she remains active with the support of her family.

May Edwards with Kim Corfield and Beverly Goodwin from Believe Housing. (Image: Believe Housing)

Mrs Edwards said: “I have a lovely big family and they come to help me with the jobs I cannot do myself, but I like to keep busy and try to keep active.

“I have a little four-wheeler to whizz around.”

She added: “My garden has always been one of my great pleasures; I still like the borders to look good.

“My family take me for a look out, we go all over.

“I enjoy a garden centre trip and going out for food.

“I’m lucky that way.”

To mark her centenary, neighbourhood officers Kim Corfield and Beverly Goodwin from Believe Housing, of which May is a customer, visited with a birthday card and a hamper.

The Thursday letters page gives its view on the second Nintendo Direct of the week, as one reader falls in love with Onimusha: Way Of The Sword.

Games Inbox is a collection of our readers’ letters, comments, and opinions. To join in with the discussions yourself email gamecentral@metro.co.uk

Mama mia!
Considering it was September I didn’t think that Nintendo Direct was too bad. They never announce anything really big at this time of year, but I was surprised by Metroid Ravenous and the new Kirby game.

I don’t care about Kirby, but Metroid looked really good and hopefully will take away the bad taste of Metroid Prime 4. To be honest, I’m surprised they even made a new game, but I suppose they started years before they realised what a dud Metroid Prime 4 was.

As usual for the Switch 2 generation, the real question is where are all the big names? We’ve had two Kirby games before we’ve had even a hint at a new Mario (I think that’s two Directs in a row where he wasn’t in any game at all) and there’s still no word on Animal Crossing, Super Smash Bros., Luigi’s Mansion, or Splatoon 4.

Whether you like these games or not the priorities Nintendo is showing are just absolutely baffling. I can only assume that something has gone wrong with the development of all these games and the ones that are coming out are quicker to make and didn’t have any problems. But it really is weird. It almost feels like Nintendo’s lost the rights to Mario or something. And where is the new IP?!
Xane

Anything but Mario
A-woo-hoo! Super Mario and the world beyond! Ahem, joke, it’s Kirby isn’t it…

You know what? No one can say there wasn’t a lot of incoming titles in that Direct, most of which I probably wouldn’t get.

Back in the N64/GameCube eras, they were my only consoles so I would of bought and traded almost all of these titles and convinced myself that Eternal Darkness, Star Fox Adventures, and Blast Corps were better alternatives to Tomb Raider, Metal Gear, and Resident Evil. But on the flip side I was playing Zelda: Ocarina Of Time, Super Mario 64, GoldenEye 007, and F-Zero GX; so swings and roundabouts.

Anyway, choice is always a good thing and there was certainly lots of choice packed in there.
big boy bent

All in good time
What surprised me about the Nintendo Direct was the sheer volume of games. It’s almost too many. I’m joking of course.

It seems the Switch 2 is going to become the indie machine. My Switch 1 is already full to the brim with games for my commute and this is pushing me more towards upgrading. This and Zelda: Ocarina Of Time.

Also, it appears, if you don’t mind waiting, then most games are going to end up on here. Maybe even GTA 6. Never say never.
Rob Taylor, Attorney at Brid Law

Email your comments to: gamecentral@metro.co.uk

Portable Legend
What a nostalgia bomb the Zelda update was, brought back great core memories as a kid. Running onto Hyrule Field for the first time, it felt unreal. Up there with Super Mario 64 for the sense of awe for the first time.

Tempted me to get a Switch 2 for sure, between being a grown-up and having kids there is just hardly any free time, so I think being able to play on the sofa while kids asleep and the Mrs watches whatever on Netflix is the only way to squeeze all these games in.
Rich

Portable Christmas
I’ve bought my little nephew a 3DS for Christmas, as he’s getting into Pokémon a bit. Would you have a list of must play games on the system? Something for him when he gets bored with Pokemon. He’s seven if it helps.

Thanks for any advice you can offer. It’s a system I’ve never used and Google just gives the same list of Mario, Metroid, etc.
Bobwallett

GC: Well, Super Mario 3D Land and Metroid: Samus Returns are very good but there’s also Zelda: A Link Between Worlds, Zelda: Ocarina Of Time 3D, Zelda: Majora’s Mask 3D, Fire Emblem Awakening, Fire Emblem Fates, Luigi’s Mansion 2, Pushmo, Mario Kart 7, Etrian Odyssey 4, Kid Icarus: Uprising, and Kirby: Planet Robobot.

Another great game
I’d never played an Onimusha game before, but thought the recent demo looked interesting, so decided to give it a go. I was also slightly influenced by the excellent work Capcom has done over recent years with the Resident Evil series and Pragmata, all of which I have thoroughly enjoyed.

The demo was impressive and piqued my interest enough to put in a pre-order, leaving me excited to know more about how the mechanics of the game and how the story might develop. Playing the final release has been a real eye-opener. Not only is it graphically stunning, with some of the best character models and animation I’ve ever seen, it offers deep and varied gameplay and the mythology, and gradual opening of the map and widening of the story, have been a joy to experience.

The swordplay is so satisfying, with a strong sense of physical connection, and the more fantastical areas of the map are so full of detail and imagination, it has really been an absolute joy to play. It has become an instant classic, sitting amongst the best games I have ever played. I highly recommend it. Thanks for the great work GC team.
Rob

GC: Thank you.

Autumn harvest
That was a disappointment after yesterday’s Zelda one. The only two games I am really interested in are Metroid Ravenous and Danganronpa 2×2, but both are next year so I try not to think of anything that far off.

Really wish we had had even a hint of a new Mario, although I guess they want to do Zelda first and then reveal it maybe.
Simon

Don’t miss Gaming news! Add us as a Preferred Source

As a loyal GameCentral reader, we want to make sure you never miss our articles when searching for gaming stories. We have all the latest video games news, reviews, previews, and interviews, with a vibrant community of highly engaged readers.

Advertisement

Click the button below and tick Metro.co.uk to ensure you see stories from us first in Google Search.

Add us as a Preferred Source

Familiar song
Hey Listen! Firstly, that full orchestra montage of Zelda melodies that preceded the Zelda news certainly give me a tingle of excitement and damn near brought a tear to my eyes.

Secondly, Ocarina Of Time reborn looked absolutely phenomenal and a dream come true for myself, that cherished the original growing up. This is exactly how I had hoped it would look in the modern era.

Honestly, though, I was pretty surprised navigating through some of the negative comments out there, attempting to paint some sort of portrait of ruin regarding the new visuals.

It’s like Star Fox 64 remake all over again, particularly the fastidious scrutiny of the character art. But less we forget, there has been a harmony of dissonance in the Zelda fandom’s idea of the ideal artistic direction, ever since The Wind Waker’s whiplashing cartoony aesthetics were unveiled.

Fortunately, many have come to accept that Fox McCloud and co.’s initially polarising new designs actually looked just fine in the finished article, and I believe that’ll be the case here.

For me, new Ocarina Of Time’s art direction is like an amalgamation of organically evolved assets from the N64 original, that Space World 2000 Zelda technical demo, the 2011 Wii U HD Zelda technical demo, and perhaps a hint of some of the more impressive Unreal Engine Zelda interpretations on YouTube; but a thousand times more considered, artistically nuanced, and resplendent.

Sure, I would’ve loved an additional dungeon or two – although such an accommodation technically hasn’t been ruled out yet and I am about as hopelessly idealistic as you can be – but I didn’t set myself up for disappointment because I was fully expecting a virtually 1:1 remake, so anything extra was a wishful bonus.

What Nintendo have delivered, though, looks transformed and more grand courtesy of the quantum leap in visual fidelity. I’d liken the Ocarina Of Time remake style to Resident Evil remake in some ways, which for my money is still the finest remake to date. In that it’s beautiful and extremely faithful to the original, with a healthy dosage of new quality of life features.

Admittedly, Resident Evil remake did also have new mechanics, lore, enemies, and a brand new area, so I don’t know where I’m going here. Just wanted to give Resident Evil remake a shout out I guess.

Visually though, new Ocarina Of Time impressed me almost as much as GTA 6’s proper reveal did, because I just wasn’t prepared for just how stunning it’d be. Which is truly a testament to the talents of Nintendo’s in-house, or out-house (?!), developers.

Watching the footage, the remake is probably how Ocarina Of Time looked like to my 12-year-old mind all those decades ago. It spoke directly to the inner child in me. That sense of wonder and childlike glee it invoked was just magical. Now I await the sand in the phantom hourglass to run its course!
GG

Inbox also-rans
Really liked the look of Metroid Ravenous in the Direct and there were a few other good things too like Fright Night and Onyx: The Dark Grip. Who knows how they’ll turn out but I liked the idea of them.
Taylor Moon

I really wish Onyx: The Dark Grip wasn’t by Bloober Team or I’d really be looking forward to it, because I love the idea of the character becoming aware of you as the player. I hope they pull it off.
Focus

Email your comments to: gamecentral@metro.co.uk

The small print
New Inbox updates appear every weekday morning, with special Hot Topic Inboxes at the weekend. Readers’ letters are used on merit and may be edited for length and content.

You can also submit your own 500 to 600-word Reader’s Feature at any time via email or our Submit Stuff page, which if used will be shown in the next available weekend slot.

You can also leave your comments below and don’t forget to follow us on Twitter.

MORE: Games Inbox: Did the Zelda: Ocarina Of Time remake live up to expectations?

MORE: Games Inbox: What will be in the Zelda Direct today?Games Inbox: What will be in the Zelda Direct today?

MORE: Games Inbox: When will GTA 6 be released on PC?

As the search and rescue operation continues following the blaze the Coast Guard have confirmed that 42 people have been rescued. Initial reports indicate there have been five deaths but this number is likely to change.

The Coast Guard and other emergency services continue to conduct search operations in the waters of Coron, Palawan.

The most shameful thing about Stella Creasy’s tweet was her glee.

The video post was to mark a day of celebration in the Muslim calendar, and pictured behind her were young women in hijabs and niqabs beaming at the camera.

With unashamed delight, the Labour MP for Walthamstow declared to the world: ‘These women are the future optometrists, lawyers, accountants, surgeons and leaders of our community and country. They also celebrate the Prophets Birthday at the Milad il Nabi March. Everyone is welcome so come next year and meet them to find out what this event is as they are fantastic!’

But Creasy had left out something important. The Muslim celebration she had lauded as being welcoming to all was not, it transpired, quite so inclusive after all.

Britain’s future surgeons and lawyers had not actually been part of the main body of the march, which was a male-only event. Instead, they had been required to stage their own separate parade, away from the men.

When challenged over this by journalist Jenni Russell: ‘Are these women segregated away from the march you posted?’ Creasy replied: ‘Jenni, they were.’

Segregation along gender lines is a topic of great interest to the former shadow minister for Crime Prevention. In 2022, when a controversy broke out over attempts by the exclusive Garrick Club to retain its male-only status, Creasy led the charge.

‘If this rule is not changed, membership of the Garrick club should be considered incompatible with membership of the 21st Century,’ she raged. ‘Whether it’s politicians, lawyers, journalists or businessmen hiding behind its panelled walls, they cannot hide how out of touch with the modern world it is to have a club which excludes women as a way of shoring up the importance of men as it does neither sex any favours.’

She also took up the fight for biological men who self-identify as trans to be granted access to safe spaces previously reserved for biological women. ‘Do I want to live in a world where we’re policing everyone who goes into a toilet? No’, she proudly stated, before claiming: ‘Do I think some women were born with penises? Yes.’

So it is somewhat surprising that an MP, who was once described as ‘a latter day Harriet Harman’, feels women and trans-women should have equal rights to be just about everywhere, except on the streets of her own constituency. Actually, maybe it’s not that surprising.

Creasy’s hypocrisy and self-righteousness are attended by a transparent cynicism. According to the last census, 25 per cent of the Walthamstow seat is Muslim. That equates to over 20,000 eligible voters, easily enough to erase her otherwise comfortable 17,000 majority.

So she has made a simple, if entirely self-serving, calculation. Her fight against the patriarchy will be waged without fear or favour. Until it risks bringing her into conflict with those of the Muslim faith. At which point the patriarchy can marginalise and subjugate women to its heart’s content.

Though to be fair to the MP nicknamed ‘Saint Ella’ by some of her colleagues because of her perceived haughtiness, Creasy is not alone in parading her grating political opportunism.

Last year, Jess Phillips, specifically appointed to the role of Safeguarding Minister because of her pioneering work in tackling violence against women, faced calls for her resignation from several victims of the predominantly Muslim rape gangs after she blocked a national inquiry into the scandal.

Again, Phillips’s decision to offload her previously inviolate principles was directly linked to the demographics of her constituency. At the 2024 election she had survived an especially toxic campaign at the hands of the fanatically pro-Islamist Workers Party. And again, the difference between her previous rhetoric, and her political timidity when faced with the potential ire of Muslim voters, was stark.

Labour’s statement about Israel’s ‘illegal settlements’ is surely an attempt to relieve pressure on their MPs facing a pincer movement from Zack Polanski’s pro-Palestinian Green Party

But then that is basically Labour’s MO now. Yesterday the Government announced it was introducing sanctions on what it termed ‘illegal settlements’ in the disputed Israel/Palestine West Bank. 

According to Foreign Secretary Ed Miliband this was to attempt to kick-start a renewed search for a two-state solution to the Middle East’s most intractable conflict. But as everyone watching his statement was aware, it was primarily an attempt to relieve pressure on Labour MPs facing a pincer movement from radical Islamist splinter parties, and Zack Polanski’s pro-Palestinian Greens.

Yet by doing so Andy Burnham and his colleagues are in danger of finding themselves riding around on the back of an especially dangerous tiger. One that will become ever more voracious as the next election approaches.

When our new Prime Minister was elected, he pledged that every new policy he announced would have to pass the ‘Makerfield test’. Basically, if it wasn’t a priority for his predominantly working class constituents in the North West, it wouldn’t be a priority for him.

Well, I spent a lot of time in Makerfield during that by-election. And I didn’t come across a single person who placed the Israel- Palestine conflict at the top of their list of pressing issues. Or who expressed their desire to attend religious marches segregated along lines of gender.

The kind of tortured moral relativity currently being paraded by Stella Creasy and her colleagues also runs into direct conflict with the brand of politics we were supposed to be getting from our new Prime Minister.

A couple of weeks ago one of Andy Burnham’s allies was at pains to stress to me how, on issues like immigration, he was attuned to the hopes and fears of working, not Metropolitan, Britain. ‘He’s from Wigan, not central Manchester,’ I was told. Creasy’s posturing demonstrates that message has yet to filter down the M6.

The PM pledged every new policy must pass the ‘Makerfield test’. But, says Dan Hodges, I did not see a single person in Makerfield who put the Israel- Palestine conflict at the top of their list

The sinister scenes in Dover, where masked men clashed with police, brought condemnation across the political spectrum. Why does this not apply to issues like gender segregation too?

But perhaps the most staggering thing about her intervention was the timing. At precisely the moment she was joyously tweeting about the women shunted aside by the men in their community parading through London’s streets, a firestorm had erupted over a different display of toxic masculinity.

The sinister scenes in Dover and Portsmouth, where masked men clashed with police, vandalised property and caused widespread disruption, had brought condemnation from across the political spectrum.

‘We have a responsibility in the times that we’re living in,’ the Prime Minister told his assembled MPs. ‘It’s a solemn responsibility to prevent the politics of poison seeping into our streets.’

Fine. But that has to be extended to all strains of that poison. This is Britain in 2026, not the deep US South of the 1930s. Segregation on our streets based on gender or race should be intolerable in all its forms. It should be especially intolerable to Members of Parliament elected on a pledge to serve all their constituents, regardless of colour or creed.

And it should be least tolerable of all to those Labour MPs who have made it their life’s work to lecture everyone in earshot about the need to challenge the abuses of the patriarchy.

‘Everyone is welcome so come next year and meet them to find out what this event is as they are fantastic!’ Stella Creasy tweeted excitedly. When the women of your constituency aren’t treated like second class citizens, with your gushing approval Stella, we will.