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The Best Way To Support Teens During Exam Season

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Exam Stress And Panic Is Prompting Kids To Call Childline

A family psychotherapist is urging parents to ask their kids a simple question to offer them tailored support this exam season.

Against a backdrop of exam stress and panic prompting hundreds of children to call Childline; therapist Fiona Yassin tells HuffPost UK that parents often think they should have all the answers to their child’s problems – “but during exam periods, that instinct can sometimes add to a teenager’s stress rather than reduce it”.

The founder and clinical director of The Wave Clinic says: “Parents may unintentionally place too much focus on outcomes, constantly ask about revision, compare siblings or peers, or move too quickly into advice-giving before really understanding how their child is feeling.

“It’s important to remember that teenagers are already under enormous pressure with the academic, social and emotional challenges that this life stage can bring.”

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Ask them: ‘What do you need from me?’

The most powerful question parents can ask during this time is “What do you need from me?”, she suggests, because it shifts the dynamic from control to collaboration.

“Instead of assuming what a teenager needs, parents are inviting them into the problem-solving process, and that immediately gives young people a greater sense of agency and autonomy,” she explains.

Teens are at a developmental stage where they’re trying to build independence and confidence in their own decision-making.

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So, when a parent moves straight into fixing, lecturing or problem-solving (even with the best of intentions), Yassin notes it can unintentionally communicate the message of “I don’t think you can handle this”.

“Asking what they need instead sends the opposite message – ‘I trust you, and I’m here beside you’,” she says.

Why it works

A few points, really. Asking this can help regulate stress “because feeling heard and understood can help to calm the nervous system”.

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“In times of anxiety and uncertainty, young people don’t necessarily want, or benefit from, solutions. Sometimes the answer might be to help create a revision schedule, but other times it might simply be to hold a safe space, [offer] gentle encouragement, or a break from revision altogether,” she explains.

This kind of collaborative approach can also help to strengthen communication between the two of you in the long-run.

“Teenagers are far more likely to open up on the big things when they feel their voice matters and their feelings are being respected on the smaller things,” adds the therapist.

How to ease your teen’s exam stress

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Teenagers are going to feel stressed during this time – it’s only natural. But there are plenty of things we, as parents, can be doing to support.

Yassin advises shifting your focus from performance to emotional connection. “It’s a small change that can make a significant difference to how a teenager feels during this time,” she says.

“Try to create regular opportunities for low-pressure conversations that aren’t solely about revision or grades. Car journeys, meal times or walks can feel less intense than formal sit-down conversations.

“As a general rule for parents, it’s important to listen more than we speak, because teenagers are often more likely to open up when they don’t feel interrupted, corrected or immediately advised.”

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It can also help to validate their emotions – saying something like “I can see this feels really stressful for you” can help kids feel understood rather than judged.

And make sure your child or teen knows their worth isn’t defined by exam results, advises the therapist.

“When parents consistently communicate unconditional support, teenagers often feel safer, calmer and more able to cope with pressure,” she explains.

“Watch your language around success and failure, and avoid framing exams as ‘make or break’. Reinforce that there are multiple pathways and opportunities beyond these exams.”

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Supporting them to maintain healthy routines around sleep, movement, nutrition and downtime can also help during this tricky period.

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Barry George cleared of murdering Jill Dando denies raping girl, 14

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Belfast Live

Barry George had his murder conviction quashed in 2007 and has denied raping a teenage girl in a new case

Barry George, who was accused of murdering newsreader Jill Dando, has denied raping a teenager almost 40 years ago.

TV presenter Dando was shot dead outside her London home in 1999. George was sentenced to life imprisonment for her murder but in 2007, had his conviction overturned through the Court of Appeal.

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The 66-year-old, of County Cork, Republic of Ireland, has now appeared before a court on suspicion of raping a 14-year-old girl almost four decades ago.

George pleaded not guilty at Southwark Crown Court on Monday to one count of rape and two counts of indecent assault. Appearing via video-link, he also denied an alternative offence of attempted rape, reports The Mirror.

The incidents are alleged to have taken place in the Hammersmith and Fulham area of west London between September 6 and 12, 1987.

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He will next appear at the court on September 30 for a trial date to be set. Judge Alexander Milne KC granted George bail.

George was arrested on suspicion of murder in 2000, a year after Ms Dando was killed. He was convicted in 2001, but the conviction was quashed in November 2007 by the Court of Appeal and he was cleared by a jury in August 2008 after a retrial.

Former Crimewatch presenter Ms Dando, 37, was one of the BBC’s highest-profile stars when she was shot outside her home in Fulham, west London, on April 26, 1999.

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No-one has been convicted of her killing since.

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Is Starmer fixing the ‘Brexit mess’ created by Farage? Readers discuss

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Is Starmer fixing the 'Brexit mess' created by Farage? Readers discuss
Readers discuss the ex-Brexit party Reform, Starmer’s prospects and the power of a vote (Picture: Sean Gallup/Getty Images)

Do you agree with our readers? Have your say on these MetroTalk topics and more in the comments

Is Streeting’s stance on rejoining the EU ‘odd’?

Culture secretary Lisa Nandy called it
‘a bit odd’ that Wes Streeting chose to highlight the possibility of rejoining the EU in his opening pitch to be the next prime minister (Metro, Mon).

It wasn’t in the least bit odd. Best for Britain found 83% of Labour supporters want to rejoin. LabourList says it’s 87% of party members.

What is odd is Labour politicians who don’t know or feign ignorance of this overwhelming pro-European view among their supporters.

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Especially weird if they want to become or remain Labour leader and PM.

‘The answer has to be bigger, it has to be the sort of things this government is focusing on around good jobs, housing, living standards, cost of energy, opportunities for young people,’ said Ms Nandy. In other words, the sort of things Brexit has had a severe, negative impact on. Peter Brown, Cleckheaton

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Monster Raving Loony Party antics

The Official Monster Raving Loony Party’s leader Alan ‘Howlin’ Laud Hope has expressed his intention to contest the Makerfield by-election.

This is the by-election in which Labour leadership hopeful Andy Burnham is hoping to see off Reform and pave his way to No.10.

Laud Hope should stand on a platform of keeping Sir Keir Starmer as prime minister, since that will not be the policy of any other candidate. David Lindsay, Lancaster

Is voting for Reform ‘blind?

I am sick and tired of people like TG (MetroTalk, Wed) talking about people who ‘blindly’ voted for Reform.

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These people didn’t vote ‘blindly’ – they voted with a clear and concise mind as having seen the Conservatives on trial for 14 years followed by along another bunch of stupids, led by the most boring chap in politics, to make a mess of it all.

If that’s not enough to make you look beyond the two mainstream parties then get with the programme, TG, you old-fashioned I’m-afraid-of-change fud.

No one is voting blind – it’s all to do with performance and it does not matter who Labour puts in, they are finished.

Likely as always this will never be published as it’s probably a Labour ‘icky’ reading this with bias. Peter, Bexley

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‘Hardly an excuse why Brexit failed to gift us any improvements’

Julian (MetroTalk, Mon) says EU fans cannot provide any negative impacts of note Brexit has had on the UK but then relies on false information and excuses about Covid and the war in Ukraine.

Both of these events have affected the economy of countries across the world, not just our own, so they are hardly excuses for why Brexit has struggled to gift us any improvements.

And while Julian is correct that we have increased our trade with the
rest of the world, he avoids that
when we were a member of the EU, we were paid hundreds of billions for our exports.

But while we are now ‘free’ to trade with the rest of the world, the deals our governments have since managed to arrange fact bring in a fraction of the money we previously saw.

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And that’s on top of all the additional paperwork and fees we face for products to be shipped through Europe – all the red tape we were warned we’d have to deal with if we left the EU.

Although I imagine, just like back in the day, this will be something else Julian brushes off as ‘Project Fear’ cwhile burying his head in the sand because he doesn’t want to hear about all the real issues. Matthew, Birmingham

‘Do cabinet members accept no responsibility forth government’s unpopularity?’

The blame for the current situation with the Labour Party (and British politics in general) all seems to have landed at the feet of the current PM.

Do the cabinet members accept no responsibility for the government’s unpopularity? If not, what have they been doing for the past two years?

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The problem is not the current leader but all those who want to have a go at the job to boost their egos rather than showing a united front.

I sincerely hope the farce unfolding in Manchester with its mayor/wannabe Labour leader-in-waiting Andy Burnham, leaves them with egg on their faces – losing an MP in Makerfield and a mayor might just teach them a lesson about duty and loyalty.

However, I suspect if this happens it will just again be laid on the shoulders of Sir Keir Starmer and not seen as reflection of their arrogance. Alan, Watford

Do you agree with our readers? Have your say on these MetroTalk topics and more in the comments

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Man cleared of Jill Dando murder denies raping girl, 14

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Daily Record

Barry George, 66, pleaded not guilty to one count of rape and two counts of indecent assault

The man cleared of murdering TV presenter Jill Dando has denied raping a 14-year-old girl almost 40 years ago.

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Barry George, 66, of County Cork, Republic of Ireland, pleaded not guilty at Southwark Crown Court on Monday to one count of rape and two counts of indecent assault. Appearing via video-link, he also denied an alternative offence of attempted rape.

The incidents are alleged to have taken place in the Hammersmith and Fulham area of west London between September 6 and 12 1987, The Mirror reports.

He will next appear at the court on September 30 for a trial date to be set. Judge Alexander Milne KC granted George bail.

George was arrested on suspicion of murder in 2000, a year after Ms Dando was killed. He was convicted in 2001, but the conviction was quashed in November 2007 by the Court of Appeal and he was cleared by a jury in August 2008 after a retrial.

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Former Crimewatch presenter Ms Dando, 37, was one of the BBC’s highest-profile stars when she was shot outside her home in Fulham, west London, on April 26 1999.

No-one has been convicted of her killing since.

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Spring Autojumble Marks 30th Year With Booming Attendance

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Spring Autojumble Marks 30th Year With Booming Attendance

An impressive 14,000 showgoers attended the 30th Beaulieu Spring Autojumble on 16th and 17th May, with numbers rising significantly on last year and highlighting the growing resurgence of autojumbles and vintage markets. Attendees enjoyed a vibrant weekend exploring stands offering everything imaginable for fans of motoring. Adding to the excitement was the introduction of the new Vintage Market, a dedicated area for sellers of vintage treasures, complete with live music. Meanwhile, the debut of the Classic Car Park display brought even more automotive charm to the event.

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Boy, 10, in hospital after falling from zip wire

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Boy, 10, in hospital after falling from zip wire

The pupil from Blackwood was on a school trip to the Dolygaer Outdoor Centre when he plunged from a zip wire

A 10-year-old boy is in hospital after falling more than 20ft from a zip wire at an activities centre in Merthyr Tydfil. The boy was on a school trip from Libanus Primary school in Blackwood to the Dolygaer Outdoor Centre when the incident occurred.

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The outdoor adventure centre said they were committed to the highest standards of safety and would ensure they cooperated fully with any investigations.

After the child fell from the zip wire, on-site staff and a teacher immediately provided first aid. The pupil also received medical care from a mountain rescue professional before he was taken to the Prince Charles Hospital Children’s Unit in Merthyr Tydfil by paramedics.

A spokesperson for Dolygaer Outdoor Centre said: “An incident occurred involving a 10-year-old student from a visiting school.

“At approximately 8pm, the student was involved in a fall. On-site staff and a teacher responded immediately to provide first aid. Medical care was further supported by a Mountain Rescue professional.

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“The student was transferred to the care of paramedics, and we understand he is now recovering in hospital.

“Our primary concern is the wellbeing of the student and their family, as well as the students and staff who witnessed this event. We are continuing to work closely with the school to provide necessary reassurance and support.

“Dolygaer remains committed to the highest standards of safety and will be cooperating fully with any further inquiries”. For the biggest stories in Wales first sign up to our daily newsletter here.

Nicola Williams, Executive Head teacher of Libanus Primary School said, “We can confirm that a pupil from the school was involved in an accident at a local activity centre last week and the whole school community wishes him a full and speedy recovery.

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“The safety and wellbeing of pupils and staff is paramount and we will be fully supporting the investigation into the cause of the incident.”

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Arrest after reports of man with hammer in Bolton town centre

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Arrest after reports of man with hammer in Bolton town centre

At around 4pm today, Monday, May 18, Greater Manchester Police responded to reports of an aggressive male on Trinity Street.

Police arrived and found a man, 53, who matched the description. He was then detained and searched.

He was arrested on suspicion of possessing an offensive weapon and now awaits further questioning as he remains in custody.

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A GMP statement said: “A short while ago, PC Sharples responded to reports of an aggressive male on Trinity Street, Bolton town centre.

“Upon arrival, a male matching the given description was detained and searched.

“The male, aged 53, has been arrested on suspicion of possession of an offensive weapon, and remains in custody for questioning.”

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Tom Kane death: Star Wars and Powerpuff Girls voice actor dies aged 64

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Tom Kane death: Star Wars and Powerpuff Girls voice actor dies aged 64

Tom Kane, the voice actor best known for lending his voice to the animated Star Wars: The Clone Wars series and The Powerpuff Girls, has died at the age of 64.

Kane died Monday, his talent agency, Galactic Productions, announced on Facebook. No other details about where and how he died were provided.

“From his unforgettable performances in Star Wars to countless animated series, documentaries, and games, Tom brought wisdom, strength, humor, and heart to every role he touched. His voice became part of our lives, our memories, and the stories we carry with us,” the post read.

“Though his voice may now be silent, the characters, stories, and love he gave to the world will live on forever,” it continued. “But beyond the incredible career was an extraordinary man. Tom was a devoted husband and father who, alongside his wife, built a loving family of nine children — three biological and six welcomed through adoption and fostering.”

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Kane voiced Yoda, the narrator and Admiral Yularen in the seven-season animated series, Star Wars: The Clone Wars, which premiered in 2008 and aired its final season in 2020.

Tom Kane retired from voice acting in September 2021 after suffering a debilitating stroke in 2020
Tom Kane retired from voice acting in September 2021 after suffering a debilitating stroke in 2020 (Getty Images)

Beyond Clone Wars, his Star Wars work expanded into video games and movies, including the 2017 movie Star Wars: Episode VIII – The Last Jedi.

Kane retired from voice acting in September 2021 after a debilitating stroke in 2020 left him largely unable to speak.

More to come

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HuffPost Headlines 5-18

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HuffPost Headlines 5-18

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Women arrested on suspicion of theft from Fenwick in York

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Women arrested on suspicion of theft from Fenwick in York

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PGMO admit crucial mistake in Man Utd win over Nottingham Forest | Football

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PGMO admit crucial mistake in Man Utd win over Nottingham Forest | Football

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